#sO I FUCKING REALIZED REAL QUICK THIS THREAD IS PROBABL GONNA GET REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE REAL QUICK

[lovelornings-archived]

@worldreamed ll Semi-plotted with Ryoba 

❥ Her family just wasn’t complete without her husband. The poor dear had lost his life in the last thing they were able to do together- taking the fall for the dozens of justified killing Ryoba had done in his name. Sent to the electric chair while the real killer walked away....oh how she had only wanted to end it all.

But she had made a promise to him. She had sworn that she’d look after their daughter after he was gone, to be a happy family again. 

And a happy family...she just couldn’t do that without a new husband. Nothing would be able to take her old one’s place, but her precious daughter was in need of a father again. 

She had planned to be there when the gorgeous young man she had chosen would wake up, but she was horrified to find that she had left him struggling against the ropes that bound his wrists to arms of the chair, along the ones wrapped around his chest and ankles. She nearly dropped the plate of cookies she had prepared in shock

“Darling, darling! Please stop! You’re going to hurt yourself!” she scrambled over to his side, putting her tray aside before she clasped his bound hand into her own. “Oh, I could never forgive myself if you rubbed your skin raw....that red only belongs in your hair...don’t break my heart like this..”

[arrowflier]

Okay, I'm trying to figure out how it all works here with asks and I'm so sorry, if I do it wrong.

Thank you for all your beautiful speedwritings, they're perfect. You're so skilled, it's incredible.

If you still take prompts, I wonder whether you could do something about Ian talking to the paralayzed Terry and telling him how he, as a farther, could do right about Mickey and how Mickey deserves everything and how while Ian doesn't understand WHY, he sees that Mickey cares about his asshole of a parent. I guess, I prompt something like Ian being protective over Mickey in front of Terry, maybe without Mickey being in the picture for the most part.

Thank you in advance, if you consider that!

Thank you anon!  Content warning: Terry Milkovich.  He deserves his own.

"Hey, I gotta run out for a sec," Mickey says after rooting unsuccessfully through the refrigerator in the new Milkovich house.  "They're out of that protein stuff the doctor said he needs."

"I'll come with you," Ian says, already grabbing for his stuff, but Mickey stops him with a hand on his chest.

"Need ya to stay here," he tells Ian.  He bites his lip, not meeting Ian's eyes.  "Don't wanna leave him alone, you know?"

No, Ian didn't know.  Because if it were up to him, Terry Milkovich would be alone and miserable for the rest of his hopefully short life.

But Mickey still felt something for the man.  If he could even be called a man after what he put his children through.  And Ian might not understand that--he stopped caring about Frank years ago, and his real father years before that--but Mickey is tired and anxious and staring unfocused over Ian’s shoulder, and Ian isn’t going to let him down.

“Okay,” he says instead.  “I’ll hold down the fort.”

And Mickey is smiling, quick and thin, and pecking him on the side of his mouth in thanks and in goodbye.

“Keep your mouth to yourself under my roof, boy,” Terry growls from the living room, and Mickey rolls his eyes and flips him off without looking.

“Back soon,” he promises Ian, backing away.  “Don’t kill him while I’m gone.”

“Aw shucks,” Ian answers flatly, eyebrows raised.  “There go my afternoon plans.”

Mickey comes back over at that, kisses him again.  Pulls back more slowly, ignoring Terry’s grumbling.

“Make it up to you later,” he says lowly, and winks.  Then he pats Ian on the cheek, and is out the door with his wallet and the ambulance keys before Ian can say another word.

It’s quiet for a moment.  Ian keeps on with what he was doing before Mickey left--rinsing out the old bowls in the sink, sipping on a beer--and Terry does the only thing he can: sit and mope.

The quiet doesn’t last for very long.

“Why are you still here?” Terry demands to know.  “You after my ass now?”

Ian can’t help it; he snorts so hard he can feel bubbles from the beer in his nose.

“Oh yeah,” he reveals.  “You got me all figured out, Terry.  I’m just with your son so I can get to your saggy, decrepit ass.”

It feels good, to wind Terry up the way he used to wind up Frank.  To taunt him without having to worry about the repercussions.  And Terry must realize he’s enjoying it a little too much, because his next words are a lot harder to laugh off.

“Shoulda put bullets in both of you when I had the chance.  Fuckin’ queers.”

Ian goes still.  Water continues to splash off the dishes, wetting his arms, but he ignores it.

“What did you just say?” he asks quietly.

“You heard me, you pansy-ass fuck.  I should have put you in the ground where you belong, and let him jump in after you.”

Ian reaches out calmly to turn off the water.

“You shouldn’t say shit like that,” Ian says softly.  Softly but sure, a thread of something in his voice like barbed wire, like blood, like the butt of a pistol against Mickey’s head.

“Did I hurt your little girl feelings?” Terry goads.  “Gonna cry now, princess.”

A humorless laugh escapes Ian as he pushed back from the counter, makes his way to the living room where Terry has no choice but to sit.

“You know,” he says casually as he does, “I used to wonder why you hated us so much.”  He smirks.  “The gays, you know.”

He doesn’t stop until he’s right in front of Terry’s chair, towering over him.  He doesn’t lean forward, doesn’t put his hands anywhere near the man.  He just stands, and looks at him.  Waits until Terry’s typical sneer starts to fall, for his eyes to dart nervously around the room.

"But that's the thing, isn't it?" Ian says finally.  "I don't give a shit if you hate me, or why."  He shrugs.  "Don't even really care if you hate him."

"Then why the fuck are you talkin to me?"

"Because your opinions are garbage," Ian answers plainly.  "You're garbage.  And if it were up to me, I'd throw you out with the molded leftovers and never spare you a second goddamn thought."

"But it isn't up to me," Ian adds.  "And Mickey asked me to take care of you, so here I am.  For him."

"You his bitch now?" Terry mutters.  His eyes may be about all he can move, but he uses them to full advantage, eying Ian up and down like there's some visible sign of his

"Thought it was the other way around."

"I'm not his bitch, Terry," Ian says calmly.  "And he isn't mine.  He's my husband--yes, husband, despite your best efforts--" he repeats firmly at Terry’s responding scowl, "and I will do everything in my power to make him happy."

"Milkoviches don't do happy," Terry grunts.  "Makes people weak."

"Well Gallaghers do," Ian counters, "and it makes us strong."

"You always did think you were better than us, you gay ginger fuck."

"Better than you?" Ian repeats.  "Abso-fucking-lutely.  But better than Mickey?"  He snorts.  "Not in a million years."

Now he does lean in, bracing his hands on the arms of that hospital-issue chair.

"Despite your best efforts, your son is amazing,” Ian tells the man he hates more than anything.  “He's a good man, a good husband.  A good uncle to my sister's kid, my brother's.”

Terry is avoiding his eyes, trying to look like he isn’t.  Ian doesn’t care--he revels in the knowledge that his very presence makes the man uncomfortable.

"I've hurt him too, you know,” Ian confesses, just to see the faint flinch Terry tries to hide.  “So many times.  And he should have left me for it, but he didn't.

“Because unlike you,” Ian continues, “Mickey takes care of the people in his life.  The people he loves.”  

Ian pulls back, away from Terry’s face, gives him room to breathe again.  Rubs a hand over his own face, and sighs.  He can hear a door slamming outside--Mickey, probably, already back from the store.

“I'm working on making it up to him,” he tells Terry while they still have the room to themselves.  “All the shit I've put him through.  Because of all the people on the earth, he might deserve it the most.”

Mickey’s footsteps are approaching the front door, and Ian moved back toward the kitchen.  Before he starts the water again, he looks back at Terry one more time.  At the face that once haunted his dreams, now pale and sweaty and forced still.

“Maybe you should try to make some things up to him, too.”

[whisperlullaby]

Don’t Over Do It

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Words: 1766

Warnings: Violence, mentions of smut, mentions of disordered eating and over-exercising, explicit language.

Summary: Your boyfriend is an asshole. Bucky reminds you that you are perfect the way you are.

A/N: Listen apparently it’s sad girl Sunday over here. This is another story from a real life thing that happened to me with a Bucky twist! Thank you forever to @river-soul​ for looking over this story. I hope you guys enjoy and if I missed any warnings please let me know!

"Doll, you okay?" Bucky wondered. "You've been really quiet all morning."

When your eyes darted up, everyone around the table was staring at you.

"Yeah, I'm fine." You looked down at your soggy bowl of cereal. "Actually I'm gonna bring this back to my room. I'm a little tired." 

You got up and left before anyone could object. You made it to your room and almost had the door shut before a metal arm pushed through.

"You don't seem like yourself. Did something happen with Sean last night?"

At the mention of your boyfriend, you flinched. Letting out a sigh you allowed Bucky to step into your room. You placed the bowl on the kitchenette counter and turned to face Bucky.

"It's nothing. Just dumb relationship stuff really," you chuckled but it was a humorless sound. "I'll be fine tomorrow, I promise."

Bucky looked at you skeptically.

"Okay, but if you need anything you know you can come to me. I'm here for you."

Bucky placed a gentle kiss on your forehead before he left. When you heard the sound of your door click shut, you grabbed your bowl and dumped it down the sink.

///////

The next day you were sitting in the shared kitchen picking at a bowl of blueberries while scribbling notes in your journal. You heard a chair scrape next to you as Bucky plopped down and leaned onto the table.

"Whatcha writing doll?"

You felt your face flush with heat. 

"I'm just writing down what I'm eating. Making sure it's all healthy, trying to be better about what goes in my body, ya know?" 

Bucky cocked his head.

"That seems like a lot of extra work. I don't think you need to keep track of what you're eating." 

He paused, eyes roamed over your figure. 

"You look great doll." 

You snorted.

 "Yeah okay, Buck whatever you say." 

You closed your journal and stood up.

 "I'm gonna head to the gym. You can have the rest of the blueberries if you want," you offered, leaving before Bucky could say anything to you.

/////////

Three hours later Bucky slammed open the door to the gym where you were dripping sweat on the treadmill.

"Steve said you've been here for hours, doll," Bucky stated an edge of anger in his voice. "You are going to run yourself straight to the med bay if you don't pace yourself."

You turned off the treadmill in a huff and stalked over to Bucky on shaky legs.

"I know my limit, Sergeant. I'm fine. Why are you being so nosey about my life all of a sudden? Yesterday, following me to my room. Today in the kitchen. What's your problem?"

"Yesterday you never made it out of your room. Did you eat anything for the rest of the day?" Bucky’s voice seemed to drip with concern. "You didn't even finish that poor excuse for a breakfast this morning and you've been here for three hours."

Your eyes dropped to the floor. You shifted uncomfortably under Bucky's gaze before your anger spiked again.

"It's none of your fucking business, Barnes. I need to lose a few pounds and how I do that is absolutely none of your concern." 

You started to shove past Bucky but stumbled your vision blurring. 

Bucky caught you as you fell into him.

"Sweetheart let me help you to your room, please." 

You looked up at him and nodded. He helped you into your room and placed you on the couch. You watched him disappear into the kitchen and return with some water before sitting next to you and pulling you into his side.

"Doll, you need to tell me what happened. What's making you do this to yourself?" 

You took in an unsteady breath.

"Yesterday Sean and I were making out in his car. It was getting pretty, um, hot and I went to get on his lap but he pushed me away. He said I was too big to have car sex with, that if I lost a few pounds we could try but he would be uncomfortable with how I looked now. That he couldn’t even attempt to maneuver me in such a small space."

You picked at a loose thread on Bucky's shirt. You didn't realize he had stopped breathing until you looked up at him and saw how red he was.

"He told you to lose weight. Because he couldn't figure out how to fuck you in a car?" Bucky seethed.

You shot up. 

“I don't think he meant it like that. I mean I've been meaning to slim down anyway. I know I put on a bit of weight since starting fieldwork."

Bucky cupped your face in his hands. 

"You've put on muscle, doll. You need it to kick ass, lord knows you can knock me to the mat like a pro. Your body is perfect exactly how it is. You do not need to put yourself through any of that shit to slim down."

Bucky’s thumbs brushed away your tears as they fell. 

"He's not a bad guy Bucky I'm sure he didn't mean to upset me. He's coming over tonight.  I'll talk to him about it."

Bucky sighed and shook his head. 

"If you need me I'm right next door," he offered, placing a kiss on your forehead.

"Thank you. I don't know what I did to deserve having someone like you in my life." 

You looked into Bucky's eyes and saw them flash with adoration.

"Oh, doll, you don't need to do anything. You deserve everything I can give you and more." 

Bucky pulled you close and hugged you. You melted into his embrace with ease.

//////

"Hey, Sean! You're just in time. I just finished up dinner."  

"Smells great." He looked at the table full of chicken parmesan, pasta, and garlic bread. "This all for me?"

You laughed. "Well, not all of it silly. I'm going to have some too."

"Don't you think this is a bit much? I thought you were trying to lose some weight. So we could, ya know, have fun anywhere." 

When he pinched the skin of your hips you sucked in a deep breath, willing the tears that pricked your eyes not to fall. 

"I just thought maybe this would be okay? I didn't think I looked that bad."

"Not bad babe just, you can tell you've put on some weight. I'm just trying to help you, do you have a salad? Maybe that'll be better for you instead." 

Just as Sean made his way towards the fridge, your door burst open to reveal Bucky. His chest was heaving and his eyes were shooting daggers.

You looked shocked as you watched him rush over to Sean with malicious intent. "Bucky stop, what are you doing?"

Bucky paused his movements but never took his death glare from Sean.

"I was walking by and I heard what he said to you."

Before you could react Bucky had Sean dangling midair. 

"You are a pathetic excuse for a man and you're lucky I don't beat the shit out of you right here. Have you ever taken one look at Y/N? She is perfect. And you don't appreciate her, she's over here pouring herself over dinner to make you happy and all you can do is worry about her weight." 

You were stunned as you watched Sean struggling in Bucky's grasp.

"Babe, are you going to tell your guard dog to heel and let me down," Sean gasped frantically.

Bucky growled as you placed a hand on his shoulder. 

"Bucky let him go. He didn't mean anything by it.”

Bucky slowly placed him on the ground. Sean moved around Bucky to face you.

“Babe of course I didn’t mean anything by it. You look beautiful, I just thought you would want to lose some of the baby fat so we could be more adventurous.”

You heard the metal plates shift before you saw Bucky pull back to knock Sean out. You gasped as Sean collapsed on the floor unconscious.

“What has gotten into you!? You heard him, he didn’t mean it he is just trying to look out for me.” You pushed Bucky back. “Why can’t you just listen to him?! He’s right! I just need to watch what I eat. Once I lose the weight I’ll be...I’ll earn his love.”

You looked into Bucky’s eyes and saw his heartbreak in real-time. 

“Y/N. You do not need to lose a single inch on yourself. Sean is a delusional asshat who wouldn’t know a gorgeous dame if she punched him in the face. You do not need to earn a person’s love.”

You stared at Bucky for a moment before you crumbled to the floor sobbing. He rushed over and cradled you to his chest, soothing you with his hands, drawing gentle patterns along your back. Sean started to stir and Bucky gently pushed you off his lap to stand and grab Sean by the collar.

“You are gone. Don’t contact her again and if I hear you’ve been around I’ll make sure you stay out a lot longer than you were,” Bucky threatened before throwing him out of your apartment.

He returned to you and helped you up. You offered him a gentle smile.

“Why did you do that Bucky?” You held your breath while you waited for his answer.

Bucky looked softly into your eyes. 

“Because you are the most beautiful person I have ever had the pleasure of knowing inside and out. Hearing what he was doing to you, warping your perception of yourself into something dangerous, I couldn’t live with myself if I stood back and did nothing. I had to protect my best girl.”

He reached out and wiped a stray tear off your face. You smiled from ear to ear and grabbed his hand to press a soft kiss on the palm.

“Thank you,” you told him, eyeing the table of food. “Well I cooked all of this and it’s probably going to get cold if we don’t eat it soon.”

“You asking me to dinner doll?” Bucky smirked.

“Well, it’s a start to thank you for everything you have done for me over the last few days. Besides I’m starving.” You started to turn around to grab the plates off the counter when Bucky grabbed your arm spinning you into him. He kissed you breathless and you were quick to deepen the kiss. 

When Bucky pulled back he was grinning.

“Let’s eat, then maybe I can show you how real men are able to fuck in a car.”

[richietoaster]

As I Am, You Understand

reddie

words: 2,217

playlist

AO3 LINK

me writing tooth rotting fluff impulsively and posting at 3:30am? more likely than you think

READ BELOW IF YOU DONT MIND IT BEING UNFORMATTED 

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Richie has a date. It’s not his first date, but it’s the first time he’s felt alive in a long time. He makes sure to shower double the time he usually does, scrubbing his body with his dad’s Sandalwood and Eucalyptus bodywash, and, fuck it, he even conditions his hair too.

He feels like he’s in a movie and that’s how he knows he’s got it bad. Richie dances in the shower using the bottle as a microphone to sing loudly. He feels ignited- on fire. Honestly, it’s a surprise to him that he’s going on a date. To the fucking carnival. What kind of teen movie is this? Richie will be going to college with the love of his life type of shit? Actually, he thinks, that’s not a bad idea. 

Richie doesn’t want to think about college, to be fair. He got accepted into UCLA, the best university ever, but all his mind consists of golden brown hair and eyes, consists of his best friend, the love of his life, and-- quite frankly, he’s not sure how Eddie said yes to a date with him. Him. Out of all people.

Richie looks over to his friends at the lunch table and throws a fry at Stanley’s face. “Any you fuckers goin’ to the carnival?” He says as Stan steals another off of Richie’s plate for payback. They’re all waiting for Eddie to get his lunch and come sit with them.

“Yeah, this weekend.” Bev responds, “Ben and I are going on a date.”

“Well, good for you for finally figuring out your feelings. It only took, what? Since the eighth grade?” Richie smirks at them. He supposes he’s not one to talk, since everyone under the sun except Eddie himself, knows about Richie’s crush on him. 

“You are not one to talk,” Mike says with a pointed look. 

“Y-Yeah,” Bill agrees, “Why don’t you ask Eddie to go with you?”

“Yeah, ask him on a date.” Ben shrugs. “What’s the worst thing that could happen?”

“The worst?” Richie asks incredulously. He counts on his fingers, “Well, one, he could say no. Two, it could make him uncomfortable. Three, he might never talk to me again. Four, he could say no. And, five, he might never fucking talk to me again.”

Stan rolls his eyes, “You’re being dramatic. Just ask him, Rich. I’m positive you’ll get the answer you want.”

Richie shakes his head, “No, nope. Mhm-hmph. I am not asking Eddie.”

Everyone’s eyes go wide, staring right past Richie. Richie feels goosebumps on his arms immediately, because oh. Oh no.. That can’t be good. 

Richie turns around and focuses his gaze on Eddie, who’s looking at him with a confused expression.

“Ask me what, Rich?”

Richie turns around to look at his friends for help, but they all exchange glances and get up to move to another table. 

“Thanks, you guys. Yeah, love you too!” Richie calls after them. 

“What was up with that?” Eddie asks, sitting down next to him, setting his tray on the table.

“I-.. Shit..” Richie breathes out a shaky breath. “I.. I.. we were talking about the town carnival this weekend.”

“Oh.. yeah, I heard it’s gonna be really fun this year.. But what does that have to do with-?” Eddie cuts himself off, and Richie can see the second it clicks for Eddie. “Richie, were you going to-?” 

This time Richie cuts him off.“N-Not like that! I mean- or- or- unless you wanted to of course? I don’t know, I figured it could be fun- like the two of us! We always have fun together. And.. And like recently it seemed like things might be feeling different between us- like- like- I don’t know, like-” Eddie covers Richie’s mouth with his hand.

“Richie. Ask me.” Richie’s eyes widen. Eddie removes his hand from Richie’s mouth.

“Eds, will you be my date to the carnival this weekend?” Richie gulps, almost afraid of this just being a cruel, and very unfunny joke. Except, Eddie’s smiling wide, and straightening up.

“Of course I will, you big dummy.” He stands and picks his tray up. “I wasn’t planning on staying long, I actually wasn’t going to even stop by the table.. but I wanted to see you guys. I have to go to the library to work on a project, but..” Eddie bites his lip and Richie really feels like he’s in a cliche movie. “I’ll call you later?”

Richie can barely process what just happened, so he settles by answering with a weak nod. 

“Great!” Eddie has a faint blush rising to his cheeks. “I’ll.. call you later, then.”

Richie watches Eddie walk away, and once he’s out of sight, he’s fist pumping the air. 

And now it’s an hour before they’re supposed to meet and Richie’s heart is booming in his chest. Honestly, Richie feels like the world’s luckiest guy. Like, for real, how the fuck did he score a date with his best friend in the entire universe? The cutest boy in mankind? It’s completely unreal, if anyone were to ask him. 

Richie arrives ten minutes early and sits on the wooden fence to wait for Eddie. He told Eddie earlier that he could come pick him up, but Eddie insisted on meeting up- claims it would be aesthetic, like an eighties movie. The cheeseball. 

But as he checks his phone each passing minute, before he knows it, it’s almost an hour. And he’s about to leave, accept that it was in fact, a cruel and unfunny joke, but he hears his name being called out.

“Rich! Richie!” He can hear Eddie sounding out of breath as he gets closer.

“Did.. did you fucking run here?”

Eddie puts his hands on his knees to breathe easier and nods, “I.. I couldn’t find my phone.. Was gonna text you and.. tell you that I’d.. I’d be late…” He inhales deeply a few times after struggling to complete a sentence. Eddie finishes, “but I couldn’t find my phone.. And then my mom was yanno.. Sonia-ing it up..”

Richie stifles out a loud laugh, “Sonia-ing it up?”

“Yeah!” Eddie chuckles. “Her being like ‘don’t go out Eddie, air is bad.’ shit like that.”

“Air is bad..” Richie repeats and continues to laugh. Eddie grins at him and takes Richie’s hand, threading his fingers between his own.

“I’m glad I got you laughing.” Eddie admits.

“Why wouldn’t I laugh at that?” 

The two walk in together, immediately going to the ticket booth and buying just enough to ride every ride if they wanted to. But their first stop is to the cheese fries. 

“Because,” Eddie shrugs, finally responding. “I was afraid you’d be upset that I was late. I didn’t want you to think that I was-”

“-standing me up?”

“Yes, exactly. But, you know that wasn’t the case, now.” 

“I’m not mad, Spaghetti. Can’t be mad at someone as cute as you.” Richie winks and Eddie’s face flushes.

“Yeah- actually, that reminds me- when did you start liking me? Because I’ve been literally pining over you for.. for.. At least freshman or sophomore year.” Eddie leads them both to a table nearby and they sit together.

“Hah,” Richie says, “I got you beat by at least a year or two. I’ve been in-” He coughs, “I’ve liked you since 8th grade when I accidentally made you trip in the hallway going to science class. You picked yourself up like it was nothing, and just smiled at me and said, ‘you’re lucky I like you’ with that little huff you do when you’re either annoyed or embarrassed.”

Eddie does the exact huff that Richie’s talking about and says, “I do not do that.”

Richie smirks at him.

“Oh, fuck off.” Eddie pauses and looks up at Richie through his eyelashes, and Richie thinks for a split second that Eddie might be debating on kissing him, but instead he continues, “I never expected in like, my wildest and probably wet dreams that you would ever like me back. But you were just babbling on and on at lunch and it just.. It just clicked for me. I figured if I didn’t help you out, you’d have a fucking stroke, so, there’s that. You’re welcome.”

“Okay first of all- wet dreams, huh? You have wet dreams about me, do you?” Eddie pushes at his shoulder and chuckles. “Okay, okay!” A quick pause. “And second of all, I wasn’t gonna have a stroke, thank you.”

“Oh, no. You definitely were. And then you had the audacity to be like ‘but it can be a date if you want it to be’ like? Have you not been with me in the same situations the past two weeks? I swear.. We both almost confessed feelings multiple times.” 

“When we were in your bed a few nights ago, your head was on my chest and I was actually terrified you were gonna wake up to the sound of it beating so loud.” Richie tells him, “You have no idea how badly I wanted to kiss you then.”

“I think I have a pretty good idea, actually.” Eddie admits. And then they’re both quiet, staring at one another, not sure if they’re supposed to make the first move or not. The moment passes, and Eddie stands up, the empty box of fries in his hand. “I’m gonna throw this away real quick.”

“Yeah, no, go ahead.”

And then Eddie’s returning seconds later to grab at his hand, “Come on, let’s get in line for the Ferris Wheel.”

Richie groans, “But the Ferris Wheel always has the longest line!”

“Stop complaining.”

“Fineeee,” Richie says.

“You’re so dramatic,” Eddie laughs. “Speaking of which, are you excited about UCLA? I know it must’ve been hard picking your major. But I’m glad you went with Theater. You’re an amazing performer.”

Richie is silent for a minute. He was really hoping they would stay away from the topic. He’s terrified of the future. “I.. thanks, honestly. It’s.. It’s so weird, you know? That graduation is literally in like, a month. We have the summer.. Together.. And with our friends.. But then everyone is off to college. It’s kinda scary, Eds. Don’t you think?”

“Well, not really, since we all got accepted into schools in California. I think it’s pretty great. We’ll be closer than you realize. And.. I’ve kept it from you for so long, but.. I got accepted into the University of Southern California.” Eddie smiles softly at him.

“Eds.. holy shit, that is literally like a twenty minute drive from UCLA.. did you fuckin’ plan that?”

“No,” Eddie laughs, “But it is super convenient, right?”

“Don’t think for a minute I won’t be spending every second I can with you. You won’t be able to get rid of me.”

“Next!” The ride operator interrupts their conversation and holds on his hand for the tickets, which Eddie hands him.

They get in the cart and the guy slams the cart’s gate shut, locking the side. “Keep your arms, legs, hands, and feet, inside the car at all times. Have fun.”

They stay quiet for a few minutes, two times around the Ferris Wheel, and then Richie speaks.

“I was actually afraid you guys would like. I don’t know. Want better friends than me in college.”

Eddie looks at him, “Rich, you know that’s absolutely crazy, yeah? We could never want to replace you.”

“That’s not what I said,” Richie grumbles.

“It’s what you meant.” Eddie retorts. “But that would never happen. We’re all gonna have the time of our fucking lives in California together. Crashing each other’s dorms parties-”

“-you’re gonna be a pariter? Yeah, okay, right.”

“New school year, new state, new me!”

“It’s not New Year’s, Eds.” Richie chuckles.

“Might as well be. Anyway, the point is we’re all gonna be together.. and.. And most importantly,” Eddie links their fingers together, “We get to be together.”

“Aren’t we together right now? I mean-” The Ferris Wheel stops and they’re at the very top. “Do you want to be together? More than friends?”

“Finally you’re getting the hint.” 

Richie chokes on his own spit. “Well, I- me too. I want that to.”

“Good,” Eddie rests his head on Richie’s shoulder. “Then that’s what we are. Together. Boyfriends.”

“Boyfriends.” Richie breathes.

“And it’ll be better when we’re out of buttfuck Derry, and in literally one of the most beautiful places in the world.” Eddie says. 

“Good.” 

“Good,” Eddie agrees, “because like I said, you’re not getting rid of me anytime soon, Rich.”

“Well, then I don’t plan on going anywhere, so I guess you’ll just have to get used to the fact that I’m gonna be in your future.”

Eddie pauses for a moment, lifting his head off of Richie’s shoulder, “Well.. then, here’s to the future.”

Without missing a beat, Richie looks down and tilts Eddie’s chin up. “No.. Here's to right now,” and leans down to press a soft kiss to his lips, Eddie’s hand reaching up to cup Richie’s cheek. Their mouths move slow and in sync together.

And, yeah, their future may be important, as graduation is slowly approaching and college is nearing closer, but so is this moment.

This moment is the start to a beautiful beginning; their beginning. 

-----------------------------------------

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[vincess-princess]

ex malo bonum

Chapter 3.

Word count: 3761 Warnings: self-harm tendencies, forced alcohol consumption (idk really how else to tag this), non-con attempt, blood, needles mention

Vince stared at the cracked ceiling.

The ceiling stared back, its cracks and spots like wrinkles and blemishes on an old face. Some more staring, and Vince would probably start seeing eyes.

His home – former home – was supposed to be somewhere above the ceiling. Somewhere up in the sky. No one knew for sure where it was, and now that Vince thought about it, he never knew where exactly it was located as well. It was just there, in him and far from him at the same time, but always at the arm’s length, always there when Vince needed it.

No. No, it wasn’t. For him, it had been there. It remained there still, yet out of Vince’s reach. Its calming, encouraging presence, constantly in the back of his mind before, was no longer there. It got lost among all those new thoughts and feelings, all products of his vessel’s weird, flawed human nature, but now also strangely personal to him too. In search of that presence, Vince delved deep into his mind, where he had never been before, and didn’t find anything.

Or rather, he did. Something he had never seen before; something so foreign and at the same time so his.

Vince yanked himself back to the reality, farther from those somethings. But having once seen them, he couldn’t pretend they weren’t there anymore.

So he decided to stare at the ceiling and focus on the pain in his shoulder. Pain was easy to understand; safe, in a way. Pain was punishing, and punishment was freeing. It was something Jesus had gone through. Maybe Vince was the next Jesus, and his cross was this blood-soaked bed, and his nails were humiliation and manhandling by those demons.

An angel would never have such a thought, something whispered to him faintly, bringing him back to reality. An angel, a true angel, would strive to become like Him, but never compare themselves to Him, because He is unreachable.

Vince shivered as though a trickle of cold, pure fear ran down his spine. He pressed his face into the pillow, trying to chafe half-healed scratches on his face, to wring more pain out of them, to have something else to focus on.

It only made matters worse. His pain mixed with his desperation, fear and unanswered questions, turning into delirium so dark, so deep Vince drowned in it, the reality, like sunlight in the water, was blacked out. He didn’t hear the door creaking, letting in a night visitor, he didn’t see his slim frame looming over the bed, and only when a hand grasped his shoulder and shook him roughly, his mind reluctantly rose to the surface.

Vince’s heart was racing, his forehead was covered in cold sweat, but relief washed over him once he saw that cracked ceiling again. Even if that was Nikki, even if he had come to do what he promised to do to him, it was still better than down there, in the dark. Vince squinted, trying to discern the visitor's face in the faint light from the street. He wouldn’t be able to tell apart Nikki and Tommy, who resembled each other like brothers, if not for the hair: Tommy’s bushy and curly, Nikki’s straight and thick.

The shadow was gangly, and the hair framing his face was messy and wavy. Tommy.

"Asleep, blondie?" Tommy confirmed Vince’s guess a second later and knelt beside the bed. He had something in his hand, but Vince didn't catch a glimpse of it.

"You know we don't sleep," Vince replied indifferently, doing his best to keep the quiver away from his voice, and after a quick glance at Tommy, moved his gaze back to the ceiling.

"Well, I dunno. You could have passed out."

Vince didn't answer. He shouldn't have done it the first time as well, but the question was so normal, so casual that for a second he forgot who was asking.

"Huh, too proud to talk to us, right?" Tommy said light-heartedly. "That's not for long." He reached up to Vince's handcuffed wrists and freed one of them, leaving his other wrist chained to the headboard.

"What are you doing?" he couldn’t help asking. Be that Nikki, he would have kept silent throughout the whole process, be that whatever had come to his perverted mind. But this wasn't Nikki.

“Fixing Nikki’s bullshit," Tommy replied shortly and reached to unbutton Vince's shirt.

That was when Vince, already baffled, couldn’t remain still. He pushed Tommy away with his free arm and rolled to the other side of the bed. He didn’t know how he had expected Tommy to react. Get angry, maybe. Drag him back. Hit him. Enchain his hand back to the headboard. There were so many options.

Tommy didn’t pick any of them. Instead, he burst into laughter. He did drag him back by his hurt arm then, making Vince hiss in pain. And kept laughing. The entire time.

"You should have seen your face. You looked so frightened,” the demon explained once his laughter subdued. Vince was pretty sure he still had fear written across his face, made worse by Tommy’s following words.

“Lie still and it won't hurt as much," he promised, unbuttoning the last button on his shirt and pulling it down Vince’s torso. Seeing Vince’s eyes widen, he chuckled. "What, are you really that afraid of losing your virginity? It's not even a real thing. Just a social construct."

With increasing desperation Vince watched as Tommy climbed onto the bed and straddled his torso, pinning his injured arm to the mattress. For a couple of seconds he enjoyed the mix of fear and disgust on Vince’s face before finally announcing: "Relax. I ain't gonna fuck you. Right now, at least. Maybe later, after I'm finished with that," he poked Vince's shoulder right above the cut.

Vince blinked in confusion, completely taken aback. He had already been mentally preparing for humiliation and pain, the only things he expected from those demons. Had expected.

“Why would you do that?”

Tommy ignored his question. “Jeez,” he grinned at the sight of Vince wincing from hearing this word so distorted, “you’ve got a lot of blood in here.” He bent forward to take a closer look at the cut. His long fluffy hair tickled Vince’s nose and got covered in blood that was all over his shoulder. “Do you even have any left?”

“Does it matter?” Vince murmured, getting increasingly uncomfortable under Tommy’s fixed, serious stare that absolutely didn’t match his nonchalant tone.

“It fucking does!” Tommy flared up, making Vince flinch. He didn’t expect him to sound so serious; he didn’t expect him to even be capable of acting that way. “You think, immortality and shit, yeah? Threw myself off a building, woke up unharmed, now I can do whatever the fuck I want? Well, buddy, it ain’t gonna work like that anymore. Bodies are fragile. They break. And you won’t get a new one any time soon, if ever. You gotta be careful with yours from now on.”

“But can’t demons possess human bodies?”

“Yeah, they can. Those like Mick. I ain’t Mick, you ain’t Mick, and it’s gonna take us half a millennium at best to even try to compare ourselves to Mick. Didn’t you feel it? He’s… he’s…” Tommy trailed off. “Well, you get it.”

Vince nodded automatically, remembering the shudder that ran down his spine when he first looked in those clear blue eyes. He did get it.

“Well, back to business,” after a second of silence Tommy dropped onto the bed the things he was holding in his hand. They turned out to be a needle, a reel of black thread and a bottle of something with a very distinct smell. “I am no doctor, so it’s probably gonna be painful and sloppy. No, it’s definitely gonna be painful and sloppy. Sorry to spoil such a great vessel. Or not sorry.” He pinched Vince’s cheek, opened the bottle and took a gulp out of it.

“Here, have some.” Despite Vince’s frantic headshaking, Tommy pushed the bottle between his lips, and Vince, afraid of getting his teeth knocked out, gave in. Tommy upended the bottle, and acold, burning liquid went down Vince’s throat, choking him and sending him into a fit of coughing. Tommy watched him with such a smug grin, he was lucky to be sitting on Vince’s free hand.

“Whiskey,” he patted the bottle lovingly. “Another great invention of humankind, after sex and rock n’ roll. Or, rather, the reason for them.”

“Tastes like shit.” Vince spat out the remains of the drink, aiming at Tommy, but missing, and most of it ended up on his own chin. Tommy snickered and wiped it with his hand.

“That’s because it’s your first time drinkin’. You’ll get used to it.” Tommy spent good five minutes threading a needle and biting his lips in frustration when the thread didn’t want to go through the eye of the needle. Having finally done it through a great effort, he dipped the needle together with the thread into the remains of whiskey. “Also a good antiseptic.”

“Good what?”

Tommy looked at him in confusion for a second before smiling wide, realization on his face. “Damn, I forgot you’re fresh out of Heaven. Alcohol’s good not only for drinking but also for killing bacteria in your wounds so that the inflammation won’t spread to other parts of your body. If not treated, it can actually kill you.” Seeing Vince’s eyes widen, he burst into laughter. “Trashy, right? The cost for occupying a human vessel. They are a pain in the ass, so fragile and prone to illnesses. Even those occupied by us.” Tommy talked so quickly Vince couldn’t even get a word in edgeways. Great, just great, he thought grimly, now he would have to look after this sack of flesh as well. As though he didn’t have other problems in need of an urgent solution.

Tommy raised the needle up to his level, observed it critically and decided it was ready to use.

“Alright, now lie still. It’s gonna hurt anyway but even more, if you twitch.”

“Very reassuring,” Vince muttered, closing his eyes and resting his head against the pillow. At the mere thought of receiving more pain his body tensed up, and Vince knew that this way it was going to hurt even more. Still, he couldn’t relax.

Instead, he heard a chuckle. “Didn’t know anyone from up there could have a sense of humor.”

Then finally came the pain. Vince winced and breathed shallowly, trying not to make a sound, not to show how he was hurting,

Tommy was definitely no good at sewing. The skin on Vince’s shoulder was already bloody and swollen, and the whole process felt like sticking needles right into the wound. Vince hissed and screwed up his eyes so hard he could see colorful circles, breathing shallowly and biting his lips until they bled. It helped, though. He managed to hold back tears, for now, he concentrated on the lump in his throat so strongly the pain from the needle shifted to the back of his mind, still there, but definitely not as acute as before. Don’t cry, don’t cry, a voice in his hand kept repeating, with dull, unhuman intonations. Don’t lose your composure, it kept saying, and it sounded reasonable.

Vince pressed his lips together tightly, not letting out a single sob, a single tear. He wasn’t going to show Tommy how bad it was hurting, because hurting meant weakness, and weakness meant humiliation.

But God, was it hard.

The cut was narrow but deep, going through almost his entire shoulder. His blood on the needle was making it harder for Tommy to hold it, and it constantly slipped out of his fingers, sometimes while it was still in Vince’s skin. Vince never said a word, just bit down onto his lower lip, again and again, his saliva metallic-flavored.

“So quiet,” Tommy murmured upon pulling out the needle from Vince’s flesh once again. His hand slipped, and the needle sank even deeper in the wound. Vince held down a groan. “Don’t tell me it doesn’t hurt, I know it does. Stop that pretense, for fuck’s sake.”

“What do you want me to do, cry? Throw a fit?” With effort, he almost – almost – managed to sound calm, but the slight quivering of his voice had managed to leak through his already battered facade.

“No, but there’s absolutely no point in holding your emotions in some situations. For example, when you get a wound sewed up with no painkillers whatsoever,” Tommy huffed. “Listen, I couldn’t care less, play a tough one if you want. Just remember that’s not gonna work with Nikki.”

“What do you mean?” Something inside Vince’s chest froze in fear. He knew already what Tommy meant, but there was still a little bit of maybe I am wrong-

“I meant exactly what I said,” Tommy cut off, in a matter of seconds shifting from carelessness to seriousness and completely demolishing Vince’s last bit of hope. He poked Vince’s chest with so much force his finger left a red trace on the skin. “You know he will come here because he always keeps his promises, and when he does come, your stubbornness will only make it worse for you. He wants to get a certain reaction out of you, and if he doesn’t, he will do literally anything, and I mean anything, to get it. You will get out of it with less damage if you just play along.”

During Tommy’s short but convincing speech the silence of the room felt choking. A cold lump in Vince’s stomach grew twice as huge. If even a demon, an evil and wicked creature, tried to warn him about another demon - it was especially serious.

But Vince’s anger, flaring up in his chest, bright, fast and burning, drowned out this very reasonable thought. Somewhere in the back of his mind Vince was surprised at how easy it had risen, powerful and all-consuming.

“If he thinks he can make me do whatever he wants, he is fucking wrong,” Vince hissed. “Did he send you to prepare the ground? To scare me into obedience? Well, tell him he’s gotta put in a real effort to get what he wants!”

His last word was muffled by Tommy’s hand on his mouth.

“Be quiet, idiot!” he whispered, glancing cautiously onto the door. Vince tried to bite him in protest, but Tommy didn’t even let him open his mouth. “You’re gonna wake everyone up!”

Vince tried to shake his hand off, but it stayed firmly on his mouth, pressing his head deep into the pillow. He struggled some more, but his every movement was sending a jab of pain through his shoulder where the needle was still staying. The stitch loosened, and Vince could feel hot drops of blood oozing from the cut.

So after a few more weak jerks, he surrendered, breathing heavily, vision blurred with tears that he tried so hard to hold back and failed.

“Fucking dumbass,” Tommy sighed, examining the stitch. “Ruined all the hard work. I can finish it, but it won’t be half as effective.”

Just do the thing and piss off, Vince wanted to say. He felt so exhausted as though he had run a mile.

“Finish,” he managed to get out. Tommy pulled at the thread, tightening the stitch and eliciting a curse out of Vince, and resumed his work.

Now that Nikki’s name came up in the conversation, Vince’s mind shifted onto him. He was stabbed too, and even deeper than Vince, but he couldn’t remember it doing him any actual harm. When they had arrived to this apartment, his bleeding had already stopped. Vince’s bleeding, on the other hand, had been going on for the rest of the day and half a night. What the?..

“Nikki is a powerful demon,” Tommy had to explain hesitantly when Vince demanded the answer. “Not as powerful as Mick, of course, but definitely not of the weaker kind. He’s been around for a good century longer than me. Still ain’t got no brains, though,” he added with unexpected fondness.

“And you?” Vince asked quickly and regretted it at the very same moment. Tommy’s face, so lively and dynamic before, as though turned into a mask.

“What me?” he said, incomprehension in his voice too perfect to be genuine.

“How long have you been around?”

“How curious you are,” Tommy’s lips were still curved into a smile, but his eyes shifted from cheerful hazel to burnt wood. “Curiosity killed the cat, y’know.”

“What?” Vince blinked in confusion. What did this have to do with a cat? “Really? How?”

Tommy looked at him blankly for a second and then burst into laughter. This time it was sincere.

“Christ, I always forget you don’t know shit about Earth,” he said once he’d calmed down. “You’re gonna be so much fun. That’s just a local saying. Means that you have to pay a price for information. Especially that personal.” He leaned forward, so close to Vince their noses almost touched, looming over him. Vince later would swear he could smell burning wood for a second. “Are you ready to pay the price, blondie?”

“No,” Vince said maybe too quickly, already cursing his curiosity. “Forget it.” Tommy’s pupils were so dilated they took up almost his entire irises. His gaze was making Vince uneasy, and his heart was beating so fast he was sure Tommy could hear it too. When Vince tried to turn his head to avoid looking at those eyes anymore, Tommy grabbed his chin with his fingers, forcing him to stay still. Just like Nikki, Vince realized, a cold shiver running down his spine. Friendlier on the outside, but inside just as dark.

“I’m already done with this,” Tommy said, observing the stitch critically, and bit the rest of the thread off. “And I think I deserve an award.”

That was the last straw.

“That’s what you came for in the first place, right? Could have just gone for it right then and not play a good one,” Vince spit out. He had enough of being scared; now all his fear turned into anger, bitter, resentful anger. Just when he started to lose caution, to relax a little, to dampen his defense and believe not all demons were alike… Fucking asshole. Assholes, all of them. Shouldn’t have answered him the first time.

“Well, mostly,” Tommy grinned, putting away the needle and the reel and reaching for the bottle. “Wanna?”

“Fuck off.”

“All right, more for me,” Tommy downed the rest in one huge gulp. “Imagine how Nikki’s gonna be pissed when he learns he’s not the first,” he chuckled, baring his teeth in a wide smile, a smile that wilted slightly when he met Vince’s gaze. A little more of that, Vince thought with grim satisfaction, and he would learn to burn holes in human skin with his eyes.

Tommy leaned to the side of the bed to put the bottle under the bed and had to let go of Vince’s hand. When he sat up, Vince’s fist collided with his cheekbone. Tommy gasped and flinched back, and Vince couldn’t hold back a sneer.

The injured hand wasn’t capable of anything serious, though. It took Tommy mere few seconds to get over the punch and straighten up. A violent wave of pain swept through Vince’s entire arm, making him hiss in pain and drop his hand weakly onto the bed. He was defenseless - again.

Vince closed his eyes, expecting a response. A punch or, at the very least, a slap on the face. That was what Nikki would do. That was what Vince himself, if they swapped bodies, would do.

Tommy started laughing.

“Oh wow, you aggressive little shit! Did you just go round punching other angels in Heaven like that? Was that why they kicked you out?”

“Curiosity killed the cat,” Vince reminded coldly, which launched Tommy into another fit of laughter so strong he almost fell off the bed.

“No, you’re totally a lot of fun,” Tommy claimed once he calmed down enough to be able to speak. “Or maybe you’re trying to get me distracted till everyone wakes up? Huh, blondie, this ain’t gonna work. I mean, yeah, talking to you all night would be pretty cool, but, y’know, a man’s got his needs, and Nikki’s been pretty moody lately.”

Vince was hardly surprised. To believe that the demons who were constantly talking about it hadn’t done it with each other before was to be an utter and complete idiot.

What was the name for it besides hooking-up, by the way?

Resigned, Vince watched as Tommy settled between his thighs, unzipped his pants and pulled them down to his knees. Although the thin fabric hardly provided any protection, its absence brought a feeling of vulnerability so strong Vince couldn’t handle looking at Tommy and stared at the door instead.

“C’mon, that’s only scary until you get down to it,” Tommy said almost sheepishly. “Humans wouldn’t obsess over sex so much if it wasn’t enjoyable.”

I’m no human, Vince wanted to say, but the words stuck in his throat.

Tommy’s hands roamed around his hips and legs, then disappeared. Vince heard the zipper getting undone.

And then – footsteps behind the door.

Tommy jumped up, his eyes darting at the door, and Vince caught a glimpse of pure terror on his face before he disappeared in a puff of smoke. The very next moment the door opened, and Mick stepped inside.

“Aha,” he said only, quickly looking over Vince, his sloppily stitched shoulder, pants crumpled at the knees, the empty whiskey bottle sticking out from under the bed. Vince’s cheeks grew strangely hot, and he hopelessly reached out to pull up his pants – hopelessly, because they were out of his reach, but remaining like this, so open and defenseless under Mick’s piercing gaze, was somehow way worse.

When Mick stepped towards the bed, Vince’s hand dropped, and the urge to close his eyes, to escape this whole situation in the only way available was so strong he later wondered what had kept them open after all. Stubbornness, maybe. Or spite. Or both.

Mick stretched out his hand and hitched up Vince’s pants until he could freely reach them. Then he turned around and left the room. Physically, because contempt – or, far worse, pity, - in his icy gaze haunted Vince for the rest of the night.

[rvnas]

                ✈️ — ⌜   hirai   momo   ,   cis   female,   she/her⌟  ↝    have   you   heard   ?   it   seems   like   the   heir   of   the   ITO   was   very   close   to   liam   yu   too   .   they   go   by   RUNA   and   they   were   liam's   BAD   INFLUENCE   .   their   network   is   of   95M   and   they’re   only   TWENTY-THREE   …   what   a   burden   it   must   be   .   i   heard   they   can   be   very   MESMERIZING   and   DEVOTED   .   but   these   last   few   months   ,   their   VOLATILE   and   SELFISH   personality   has   been   showing   more   .   the   media   is   sure   having   a   filled   day   with   them   !    i   hope   this   road   trip   with   friends   will   help   them   .   did   you   know   that   POSING   ON   THE   HOOD   OF   SOMEONE   ELSE’S   MASERATI   ,   13   MISSED   CALLS   FROM   HOME   ,   GLITTER   RIMMING   TIRED   EYES   AND   BROKEN   MIRRORS   really   show   their   true   persona  ?   maybe   liam   was   the   only   one   who   knew   that    ...  

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     quick  stats  !

full  name  :   haruna   ito   .

nickname(s)  :   runa   ,   ru   .

age   :   twenty-three   .

zodiac  :   aquarius   sun   ,   aries   moon   (  click   !  )

spoken   languages   :   japanese   ,   korean   ,   mandarin   ,   french   &   english   .     

sexuality  :   bisexual   .

alignment   :   chaotic   neutral   .

pinterest   :   (   click   !   )  

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     backstory  !    (  tw  :  death   ,   parental   neglect   &   drug   /   alcohol   use  )

the   daughter   of   the   ceo   to   a   real   estate   &    construction   conglomerate   and   his   high   school   sweetheart   turned   interior    designer   wife   ,    runa   ito   was   born   into   money   .   they   lived   in   tokyo   ,   the   same   city   her   grandfather   had   originally   started   his   company   back   in   the   40′s   ,   and   although   ito   property   group   had   accumulated   massive   wealth   and   international   business   by   the   time   runa   was   born   ,   her   parents   wanted   to   start   their   family   where   it   all   began   .

she   doesn’t   remember   much   about   her   early   life   —   a   blur   of   employees   and   family   members   alike   ,   their   faces   often   melting   into   one   ,   as   everyone   had    a   hand   in   raising   the   young   girl   .   her   father   was   a   busy   man   ,   after   all   ,   the   parent   who   paid   the   most   attention   to   young   runa   being   her   mother   .   there’s   not   much   runa   will   remember   about   her   childhood   in   japan   but   the   lullaby   the   woman   used   to   sing   to   her   at   night   is   something   she’ll   carry   with   her   for   the   rest   of   her   life   .

a   few   months   after   runa   turned   nine   is   when   her   memories   seem   to   begin   ,   spearheaded   by   the   tragic   death   of   her   mother   .   a   heart   attack   in   the   middle   of   the   day   ,   sudden   and   unexpected   .   it   was   runa   that   found   her   on   the   floor   in   the   garden   ,   the   scent   of   roses   that   had   blossomed   under   the   woman’s   gentle   care   thick   and   sweet   .   she   was   frozen   in   place   until   the   paramedics   arrived   ,   unmoving   even   after   her   father   broke   down   in   tears   right   in   front   of   her   ,   so   still   that   the   paramedics   were   concerned   enough   they   carted   her   off   to   the  hospital   .   shock   .   it   was   shock   ,   she’d   later   learn   ,   but   runa   didn’t   think   that   word   was   big   enough   to   describe   the   way   it   felt   like   something   inside   of   herself   had   passed   along   with   her   mother   .

by   the   time   she’s   eleven   everything   had   changed   .   following   the   death   of   his   wife   ,   her   father   had   relocated   them   to   new   york   city   ,   something   the   media   would   call   a   fresh   start   but   runa   knew   was   bigger   than   that   .   he   was   running   away   from   his   grief   ,   and   although   the   man   would   never   be   the   same   he   still   managed   to   remarry   ,   now   heading   ito   property   group   in   booming   downtown   manhattan   .   two   years   later   the   couple   celebrates   the   birth   of   a   beautiful   baby   girl   azumi   ,   the   only   thing   runa   is   grateful   for   since   her   old   life   in   tokyo   .

adjusting   to   life   in   new   york   wasn’t   easy   for   runa   .   she   had   never   been   a   difficult   child    ,   but   unresolved   emotions   have   her   feeling   like   a   time   bomb   with   no   control   of   when   or   how   she’s   going   to   explode   .   the   start   of   her   teenage   years   are   marred   by   schoolyard   fights   ,    stealing   from   convenience   stores   ,   talking   back   to   adults   for   no   good   reason   .   she   didn’t   mean   to   get   into   trouble   ,   she   really   didn’t   ,   but   she   had   no   idea   what   to   do   with   all   the   hurt   inside   her   .   at   home   she   felt   like   a   stranger   —   like   she   was   just   a   guest   watching   someone’s   family   from   the   outside   .   when   her   stepmother   voiced   concerns   over   runa’s   behavior   and   her   possible   involvement   in   azumi’s   development   runa   was   branded   a   bad   influence   before   she   was   even   fifteen   years   old   .   

her   father   hadn’t   stuck   up   for   her   ,   the   man   too   busy   to   notice   his   daughter’s   suffering   or   perhaps   too   in   denial   about   his   own   to   even   acknowledge   the   way   life   was  unfolding   inside   his   household   .   he   was   distant   at   best    and   straight   up   absent   at   his   worst   ,   leaving   runa’s   stepmother   to   raise   azumi   all   on   her   own   .   the   ito’s   might   have   looked   picturesque   from   the   outside   ,   but   unbeknownst   to   the   public   eye   the   family   was   imploding   .   her   father’s   second   marriage   was   hanging   by   a   thin   thread   .   he   resented   his   second   wife   for   not   living   up   to   a   woman   who   had   been   dead   for   over   five   years   now   ,   and   in   turn   the   woman   resented   runa   for   reminding   her   of   the   person   she’d   never   live   up   to   .   the   only   control   her   stepmother   had   of   her   own   life   was   spent   making   runa   out   to   be   a   threat   to   the   safety   of   her   actual   daughter   ,   not   caring   or   noticing   the   love   and   fondness   runa   and   azumi   had   for   each   other   .

if   you   hear   something   enough   times   ,   it’s   only   natural   you   start   to   believe   it   ,   that   you’d   accept   it   as   a   truth   .   seventeen   years   old   and   runa   becomes   exactly   who   she’d   been   made   out   to   be   —   bad   .   in   a   way   it’s   almost   a   comfort   .   that   overwhelming   sensation   of   guilt   that   used   to   choke   her   after   every   outburst   was   slowly   lifted   as   she   accepted   there   was   no   use   in   fighting   to   be   good   if   no   one   believed   it   .   she   must   have   been   born   this   way   ,   every   fuck   up   a   marker   of   her   predetermined   character   .   she’d   given   up   control   ,   and   as   much   as   runa   tried   to   make   herself   believe   it   wasn’t   her   fault   ,   that   she   couldn’t   change   who   she   was   deep   down   inside   ,   she   knew   the   truth   .   she   was   taking   the   easy   way   out   .   better   to   be   hated   by   the   people   who   were   supposed   to   love   her   unconditionally   than   to   acknowledge   she   deserved   better   .   it   was   easier   to   be   reckless   and   selfish   ,   every   stunt   she   pulls   a   welcome   distraction   from   how   empty   all   the   collective   abandonment   in   her   life   had   left   her   .  

she   surrounds   herself   with   people   she  decides   are   reflections   of   herself   .   hollow   ,   impulsive   people   with   little   regards   to   consequence   .   she   gets   drunk   ,   she   gets   high   ,   she   shoplifts   things   she   could   buy   without   blinking   just   for   that   temporary   thrill   .   she   says   she’ll   try   anything   once   ,   danger   be   damned   ,   her   own   life   be   damned   .   she   shows   up   to   her   father’s   business   events   long   after   he   stops   inviting   her   ,   makes   a   show   for   the   press   when   she   openly   flirts   with   business   in   front   of   their   wives   ,   when   she   downs   whiskey   sours   at   the   bar   snap   chatting   the   whole   thing   ,   when   she   publicly   denounces   the   ito   name   to   anyone   who   stops   and   listens   .   a   whole   year   of   paying   off   cops   to   keep   runa’s   records   clean   (   for   the   sake   of   the   family   business   ,   never   for   her   )   ,   of   opening   up   about   his   daughter’s   troubled   mind   (   not   for   her   own   betterment   but   to   save   stock   prices   from   dropping   too   low   )   ,   of   hiring   a   revolving   door   of   nannies   to   keep   azumi   far   out   of   runa’s   orbit   .   the   ito’s   wait   until   she   turns   eighteen   to   properly   kick   runa   out   ,   not    bothering   to   threaten   cutting   her   off   from   her   trust   fund   because   they   wanted   her   gone   that   desperately   .

and   runa’s   happy   to   go   .   she’s   got   access   to   the   penthouse   of   every   building   her   father   owns   ,   bouncing   from   one   place   to   the   next   as   she   inevitably   does   something   to   get   herself   kicked   out   .   property   damage   ,   noise   complaints   ,   letting   just   about   anyone   she   meets   on   a   night   out   practically   move  in   rent   free   —   the   list   is   a   long   one   .   it’s   then   when   she   meets   liam   ,   and   he   quickly   becomes   the   light   at   the   end   of    a   dark   tunnel   runa   hadn’t   even   realized   she   was   in   ,   because   he’s   not   like   anyone   else   in   her   life   .   he   sees   her   .   past   all   the   fuck   ups   he   sees   her   ,   sees   that   she’s   more   than   the   unstable   party   girl   the   press   has   made   her   out   to   be   ,   that   she’s   not   the   villain   her   family   needs   her   to   be   in   order   to   feel   better   about   the   fact   that   they’d   failed   her   .   he   was   the   first   in   a   long   time   to   recognize   any   of   it   and   she   has   no   idea   what   to   do   about   it   .

 for   a   little   while   he   makes   her   a   better   person   ,   or   at   least   want   to   try   to   be   one   .   the   light   liam   radiates   towards   anyone   in   his   life   isn’t   lost   on   her   ,   but   very   quickly   runa   realizes   just   how   uncomfortable   she   is   feeling   that   warmth   ,   the   feeling   so   unfamiliar   she’s   terrified   to   bask   in   it   too   long   .   her   first   instinct   is   to   reject   it   ,   to   reject   him   and   the   friendship   he’s   offering   her   ,   to   run   as   far   away   as   she   can   from   all   of   it   .   but   she’s   selfish   ,   and   more   than   that   she’s   lonely   ,   devastatingly   lonely   that   the   idea   of   cutting   out   the   one   friend   she   really   had   was   more   than   she   knew   she   could   take   .   she   does   the   next   best   thing   —   she   pulls   him   into   her   darkness   .   it   wasn’t   too   hard   of   a   feat   to   influence   someone   who   was   used   to   having   fun   ,   especially   when   that   someone   wasn’t   one   who   liked   saying   the   word   no   whenever   someone   had   a   crazy   idea   .   liam   already   had   his   feet   in   the   water   when   it   came   to   being   spontaneous   .   all   runa   was   doing   was   pulling   him   towards   the   deep    end   more   and   more   everyday   .

it’s   a   manipulative   thing   to   put   someone   you   love   in   danger   ,   to   ask   for   companionship   on   a   stupid   stunt   because   she   knew   he’d   say   yes   if   she   said   she   needed   it   ,   to   pretend   that   maybe   just   maybe   liam   was   the   same   as   her   and   she   really   wasn’t   influencing   him   at   all   but   opening   his   eyes   to   bigger   and   better   possibilities   .   she   knew   it   ,    every   minute   of   the   day   she   knew   it   ,   but   it   wasn’t   enough   to   ever   make   her   stop   .   he   gave   her   the   acceptance   she’d   never   gotten   at   home   and   she   gave   him   excitement   but   that   didn’t   make   it   alright   .   when   she   gets   the   news   he’s   dead   ,   she’s   back   in   the   garden   of   her   childhood   home   all   over   again   .   it   doesn’t   make   any   sense   at   all   ,   and   runa   refused   to   let   it   ,   picking   fights   with   anyone   who   dared   utter   he   was   in   a   better   place   .   there   was   no   room   in   her   heart   for   so   many   emotions   ,   so   she   does   what   she   can   to   drown   them   out   ,   quiet   and   out   of   the   public   for   the   first   time   in   years   because   of   how   hard   she’s   self   medicating   .   months   go   by   before   her   step   mother   reaches   out   .   azumi   has   a   ballet   recital   on   sunday   is   all   the   voicemail   says   ,   but   those   seven   words   are   enough   to   draw   runa   out   ,   to   get   her   to   come   home   for   the   first   time   since   they’d   kicked   her   out   .  

whatever   tiny   hope   runa   had   that   her   family   had   been   concerned   with   her   well-being   was   shattered   when   she   learns   the   call   had   been   a   trick   ,   a   false   pretense   as   requested   by   her   father   .   he   had   a   proposition   for   his   oldest   daughter   which   was   really   more   of   an   ultimatum   —   runa   had   one   year   .   one   year   to   either   get   her   life   together   and   start   working   under   his  iron   fist   as   a   director   at   ito   property   group   or   be   excluded   from   his   will   and   properly   disowned   ,   never   allowed   to   be   more   than   ten   miles   from   her   younger   sister   as   long   as   she   was   a   minor   .   it   wasn’t   long   after   her   father’s   proclamation   that   runa   gets   the   invitation   to   go   on   the   road   trip   .   she   doesn’t   think   she   cares   ,   swears   she’s   not   interested   in   remembering   liam   in   the   company   of   people   who   no   doubt   had   less   than   kind   things   to   say   about   the   girl   that   was   infamous   for   being   the   permanent   devil   on   a   dead   man’s   shoulder   ,   but   a   bottle   of   the   expensive   stuff   all   to   herself   later   that   night   and   she’s   saying   yes   ,   she’s   coming   ,   because   despite   everything   she’s   sworn   is   true   about   herself   and   about   how   she   feels   she   needs   this   trip   more   than   she’d   ever   admit   .                                                                             

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     personality  +  tidbits  !

aha   ...   where   oh   where   to   begin   JSBDJWDBJW   i   feel   like   hot   mess   it   the   perfect   and   easiest   way   to   describe   her   💔😔   not   to   b   all   she’s   complicated   but   !   she’s   complicated   !!!

on   one   hand   she’s   a   lot   of   fun   ,   and   i   mean   a   LOT   like   in   a   room   full   of   people   it’s   easy   to   feel   drawn   to    her   bc   she’s   got   an   exciting   kind   of   energy   surrounding   her   .  she’s   that   type   of   person   that   you   know   you’re   gonna   have   fun   with   no   matter   what   you   guys   do   even   if   you   have   no   idea    what   kind   of   shenanigans   to   expect   because   she’s   always   doing   something   new   and   not   predictable   .   

on   the   other    hand   ?    yea   she’s   kinda   fucking   crazy   not   2   get   all   lana   del   rey   but   SJDBWJBDJWBJWD   runa   has   a   concerning   lack   of   care   for   her   own   health   and   safety   so   in   turn   she’s   not   too   concerned   abt   anyone’s   else’s   health   and   safety   ,   either   /:   she’s   just   following   the   traumatized   girl   handbook   doing   reckless   stuff   just   to   feel   something   and   all   that   jazz   it’s   all   fun   and   games   until   u   have   a   near   death   experience   jumping   off   a   yacht   super   wasted   at   a   billionaire’s   party   ...   and   even   then   it’s   still   fun   and   games   if   ur    runa   <3

mommy   issues   ?   yup   ..   daddy   issues   ?   yup   again   baby   we   got   two   for   two   😭   runa’s   desire   to   be   nurtured  and  have   someone   hold   her   face   and   say   i   care   abt   u   versus   her   attraction   to   ppl   who   literally   couldn’t   tell   u   if   she’s   happy   or   sad   fight   to   the   death   !!!   yes   she   wants   love   and   acceptance   yes   she’s   gonna   ruin   any   chance   she   has   at   getting   that   by   pushing   ppl   away   or   purposely   fucking   up   so   they   just   give  up   on   her   the   way   her   dad   and   stepmom   did   .   literally   she’s   like   i   want   to   be   loved   no   i   don’t   yes   i   do   .   don’t   .   yea   <3333 

idk   if   any   of   you   have   ever   met   an   aquarius   that   literally   makes   no   damn   sense   and   ur   just   like   what   universe   do   u   live   on   bc   it’s   impossible   to   try   and   plan   something   with   them   and   when   they   do   finally   message   u   back   it’s   asking   u   to   come   out   to   a   club   at   2   am   when   ur   already   in   ur   pajamas   but   that’s   runa   ...   except   if   u   get   out   of   bed   and   finally   show   up   to   the   club   she’s   already   gone   SJDBWJDBJWD

she’s   moody   😔   one   minute   she   can   be   having   the   time   of   her   life   and   she’s   being   really   open   and   fun   and   the   next   she   can   just   totally   shut   down   and   get   really   cold   and   bitchy   or   really   angry   and   it’s   /:   truly   not   a   good   time   !   she   really   isn’t   a   bad   person   but   she   DOES   make   lots   of   mistakes   and   if   you’ve   got   a   negative   opinion   about   her   she’s   not   going   out   of   her   way   to   change   it   or   prove   u   wrong   ,   in   fact   she’s   way   more   likely   to   prove   u   right   bc   that’s   the   easy   way   out  

super   super   devoted   to   people   she   cares   about   !   even   if   she’s   not   open   about   the   fact   that   she   cares   you’ll   know   bc   if   u   ask   her   to   do   something   or   go   someplace   she’ll   do   it   no   questions   asked   

does   anyone   rmr   that   one   tweet   where   it’s   like   “   hmu   if   ur   toxic   im   trying   to   have   a   crazy   summer   “   runa   is   both   the   person   tweeting   and   the   toxic   person   they’re   looking   for   .   duality   <3

flirts   as   easy   as   breathing   but   it   legit   means   ...   nothing   like   she’ll   just   mindlessly   flirt   her   way   through   life   just   bc   she   can   !   uses   her   pretty   privilege   for   free   stuff   despite   being   rich   .   has   never   been   in   a   serious   or   a   committed   relationship   and   she’s   not   abt   to   start   now   she’s   got   mega   abandonment   issues   to   work   on   first   </3333   is   always   down   for   a   good   time   though   runa   believes   in   whore   rights   😏😏

dresses   like   an   e   girl   even   though   she   legit   doesn’t   know   wtf   that   is   ...

can’t   stand   the   sight   /   smell   of   roses   bc   they   remind   her   of   her   mom   ): 

likes   to   make   very   large   donations   in   her   father’s   name   to   really   progressive   organizations   to   piss   off   all   the   boomer   shareholders   of   his   company   (:

has   never   used   🥺   this   emoji   in   an   not   ironic   way   her   whole   life   i   told   u   guys   she’s   CRAZY   ...   

loves   to   sweet   talk   ppl   into   getting   into   doing   wild   stuff   if   she   hits   u   up   with   a   wyd   text   IGNORE   her   unless   u   wanna   end   the   night   with   a   broken   wrist   or   a   matching   ass   tattoo    ...

who   was   that   one   twitter   girl   that   stole   someone’s   hamster   at   a   party   i   can’t   rmr   her   name   but   /:   that’s   runa   SJDJWBDWJBDJW   

lies   abt   the   randomest   things   sometimes   for   literally   no   reason   like   someone   can   be   like   hi   im   amy   (:   and   she’ll   be   like   aw   that   was   my   grandma’s   name   like   no   it   wasn’t   don’t   ask   me   why   she’s   like   that   ...       

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     wanted  connections  !  (  all  open  to  all  genders  )

okay   i   was   gonna   type   a   bunch   of   bullets   here   but   this   intro   is   literally   already   disgustingly   long   and   LATE   im   .   so   embarrassed   ...   i’m   seriously   down   for   anything   though   like   platonic   romantic   wholesome   angsty   enemies   old   family   friends   a   i   keep   calling   ur   mom   a   milf   and   u    hate   it   connection   ...   whatever   it   may   be   i’m   open   🥺  

truly   i   hate   this   life   i   wrote   a   novel   for   NO   good   reason   ...   if   ur   like   me   &   prefer   discord   for   plotting   u   can   add   me   @   glo lovecore ʕ´• ᴥ•̥`ʔ#8172   and   we   can   plot   there   💖 💖 💖   if   discord   isn’t   ur   jam   though   we   can   plot   via   tumblr   ims   im   just   gonna   be   harder   to   reach   that   way   so   it   might   take   a   little   longer   🥺   im   sosososo   excited   to   be   here   &   finally   write   with   u   all   i’m   sorry   this   intro   took   forever   !!!!    

[auswriteforyou]

To Be The One. (Deacon, SWAT)

Requested.

Summary: the one where no one can admit their feelings and you apparently dont know how to use a butter knife.

TW: i cuss a lot, mentions of blood, knives, also finger wounds.

“Fucking shit,” The skin of your finger flayed open, the knife slipping from your hand with a curse as you clutched your hand haphazardly to your chest. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” You chanted, shoving the cut under the sink in the SWAT break room, rinsing the blood from the fragile flesh just to see the damage.

“You okay?” Deacon’s voice startled you, a low timber over the hum of the refrigerator and the sound of your cursing. “Woah, what did you do?” He dropped his bottle of water back in the fridge, leaving the door swinging open in his haste to reach you.

Strong fingers didn’t flinch at the blood as he reached into the steady stream to cradle your hands with his. You tensed against the contact, leaning slightly away from him as he invaded your space but welcomed it nonetheless. He was muttering to himself, something about how you could handle a sniper rifle but not a butter knife and you resented the statement but couldn’t disagree with him.

You had joined the team a little over a year ago, only a few months after Deacon’s sudden divorce from the wife everyone thought would be his happily ever after. You hated him.

Perhaps it was his stuck-up manner, his prudish demeanor so opposite to yours that it made your hairs stand on end. You constantly felt his eyes on you, evaluating you with an icy cold gaze that made it impossible to feel comfortable in your own skin. It was four months in that you realized he wasn’t watching you because he thought you couldn’t do your job but rather because he was intrigued by your natural talent, how you’d fallen in with the team so easily.

You guess that was the night you fell in love with him. Your father had always said there was a thin line between love and hate.

It’d been a hard day, probably the hardest you’d had since joining the team and your nerves were shot to shit. When he walked up behind you in the locker room, you weren’t exactly proud of the way you yelped, falling off the bench and cracking your lower back against said seat hard enough to leave a bruise for the next six days.

“Sorry!” He was quick to apologize, wrapping his deft hands under your biceps to lift you into a standing position and you yelped again. It wasn’t everyday a grown ass man lifted you into the air, at least not since you were fourteen. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“It’s alright,” You acquiesced, finally turning to face him and you’d recognize that look on his face anywhere. “I’m okay.”

“I didn’t even ask you anything yet.” His lips tilted in a half amused smirk.

“I know pity when I see it.” You huffed, throwing your duffle onto the bench and continued to throw the days items in it. This time he let out a laugh, settling heavy beside your bag and looked up at you with cerulean eyes.

“Concern, never pity.” And when he patted the seat next to him, you took it. “It was a tough case today.”

“Yeah.”

“And you’re okay?” He didn’t respond when you nodded. Actually he stayed fully silent, not even a sigh leaving his lips, until you looked up and made eye contact with him. He just stared at you, long enough to let your thoughts take over and tears well in your eyes.

He moved without hesitation, one hand hooking behind your neck as the other ghosted the curve of your back and pulled you ever closer to him. Your resolve broke the moment your head hit his collarbone. He didn’t shush you, still didn’t speak as he rubbed soothing circles into your spine as you let out the days frustrations. Frustrations for the ones you couldn’t save, for the problems you couldn’t fix.

It wasn’t until you had stopped crying, unbeknownst to how much time had passed in his comfort, that he spoke.

“You okay?” And when you told him no, he stayed there and spoke to you until you were.

And that was it, that was the night you knew there was no one else in the world who would ever understand you like him.

He must have felt the same, both of you being attached at the hip so much that a bet had begun between the other team members on how long it would take for you both to get your heads out of your asses. Completely without your knowledge, of course.

“I’m okay,” you assured your best friend, utterly confused on why he was freaking out like that.

“Yeah, I’ve heard that bullshit before.” He teased, using his own fingers to rinse the cut out despite your continued protest that you were fine and whatever the fuck he was doing hurt a shit ton more than the cut.

“I have to irrigate the wound, you know that.”

“Shut up, it hurts.”

“Yeah, you might’ve mentioned that.”

So you let him be a macho man. It was not like you personally wanted to clean out the gaping wound, not when you could lean forward and rest your forehead against his shoulder while he worked away and rest your tired eyes a little. You’d both stayed up late last night, him crashing on your couch once again and definitely didn’t get enough sleep for a shift this lackluster.

“I think you need stitches.” You must have dozed off, his words jolting you. His smirk was evidence that he knew not only that you were sleeping but that you hadn’t heard him. “You need stitches.

“Okay - wait, what?” You demanded, drawing the cut finger into your view and gagging a little at the flayed wound. You groaned throatily, throwing your head against his broad chest as you complained. “I hate stitches.”

His fingers threaded through your hair, tangling and untangling with ease. He’d had enough practice the last few months. You knew you should stop him, that you were nothing more than friends and this would only make it harder when he finally did find someone. It would ruin every other man for you, that no one would ever understand you or care for you or be as kind to you as this man right here. But you couldn’t, not when you could pretend for just a few moments that this was real.

“I know you do, but I’ll be right there with you the whole time, okay?” Your head snapped up, face inches from his but you didn’t pull away, both of you used to being this in each others space.

“You don’t have to take me.” You chuffed, fingers still cradled between your chests as he cocked his eyebrow nearly up into his hairline.

“Well you’re not going to drive yourself, especially after they give you pain meds.”

“No, but I can get an Uber.” His face turned stern, something deep within those baby blues that made you sit up a little more straight, pull back just an inch.

“You absolutely are not getting an Uber while you’re incapacitated.” You opened your mouth to argue but paused mid sentence. That was your greatest fear, being unable to defend yourself in a common situation despite knowing exactly how to. “Exactly, let me take you.”

“No, it’s okay, really. I can ask Hondo.” If one could win awards for amount of expressions in under a minute, he’d take first prize as irritation clouded his handsome features.

“Why won’t you just let me take care of you?” He sucked in a harsh breath the moment the words left his lips, eyes widening like saucers as you furrowed your eyebrows.

“It’s just a cut finger, relax.” Take care of you? You hadn’t so much as had a cold in the last year, you hadn’t needed any care.

He stared at you for a long moment, long enough for you to get uncomfortable and slowly pull your fingers from his grasp. He was making you uneasy now, a feeling you hadn’t had towards him since you’d joined the team. The feeling only grew when he grabbed your face with both hands, your mouth falling open to protest but he didn’t let you get that far.

“I want to take care of you.”

“If it’s that big of a deal to you then you can take me.” You were more than a little offended when he rolled his eyes at you.

“No, you’re not listening to me. I want to take care of you.” Had he hit his head?

“Deac, I’m gonna need a few more adjectives, maybe some nouns. A verb or two might be nice.” Your words fell like lead in the room, no reaction from the man in front of you and it took all you're might not to worm out of his grip. He had something to say, clearly, you just needed to let him find the words.

“I want to be the one to take care of you. I want to be the one to hold you when you cry, the one you call when something good happens, when something bad happens. I want to be the one that you come home to, the one who makes you smile and the one who makes you laugh. I want to be the one you make memories with, the one who talks you out of those stupid ideas you have running through your head. I want to be the one to go to the hospital at 2 pm on a Tuesday with you because you’re so adorably clumsy that it kills me. I want to be the one to kiss you goodnight, the one who wakes up to your messy bedhead and debates laying in bed all day just to keep you in my arms. I want to be the one to take care of you, everyday and always.”

Heartbeats pounded in your ears, you couldn’t even tell if they were yours at the weight of his words. He wanted you? Deacon, the man you’d been in love with for months who you had finally accepted would never love you back, wanted you?

You were unable to speak as your eyes followed his as he traced your features with his gaze. His eyes lingered on your lips before flickering back up to your eyes, holding your gaze in a heart stopping moment. He smiled, small and shy as he admitted what he’d been working up the courage to say since he met you.

“I want to be the one you love.” Your smile could’ve lit the stars in the sky, his own breaking through his nervous mask as you laughed into the quiet room.

“Oh Deac,” You whispered, going onto your toes to press your nose to his. “Don’t you know? You’ve always been the one.”

—

i still dont know how to finish stories without cliffhangers and who knows if you ever get your finger stitched but we’re at 1800 words and i need to relax lol but yay! i finally watched swat and i need everyone to know that i would marry shemar moore right now, that is all

[killjoy-loveit]

Hack This Part 9

A/N: You may or may not know the drill by now, but here it is anyways: this is in 1st POV (like my other stuff), I hope it will be 10 parts (if it isn’t I will make it very clear), and I would also like to clarify that everything written in this story is complete fiction. When mature content starts it will be denoted with ***

Summary: Reina almost loses hope for receiving the file, and her feelings are laid bare.

Word Count: 2,175

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 10

Bonus Scene

Profanity/MATURE CONTENT Warning!

***Do NOT read if you are uncomfortable with sexual content!

    I didn’t hear from Noah for two weeks. Two weeks. The only option was to assume she got caught and for some reason that left my stomach in knots. My one chance of getting Z’s file was obliterated, just like that, and it was killing me. Now I would have to find some other way to get to it, if there even was a way and this wasn’t just some hopeless fools errand. I think I might have to get Z involved, it might be the only way now, as much as it pains me to admit.

    “Z?” I call out, stepping into the living room.

    “Yeah?” He answers back, sticking his head out from the archway of the kitchen.

    “I need to talk to you.”

    Z moves out of the kitchen hesitantly. “This doesn’t sound like a good thing. Did I do something wrong?”

    “No, no. Nothing like that, Z. It’s- it’s something I did. Something I need your help with.”

    A frown replaces the unease on his face as he makes his way over to me, taking my hands in his. “What is it?”

    “I--.” I get cut off by the abrupt ringing of my phone. Pulling it out of my pocket, completely prepared to silence it, or shut it off entirely, but the name lighting up the screen made me freeze. In that moment I forgot about Z’s presence, hurriedly answering the phone and pressing it to my ear. “Noah?”

    “Thought I was dead didn’t you?” Her snarky tone came across the line.

    “Yes, actually.” I murmur, looking up at Z’s face at the squeeze from his hands.

    “I got the file. It took longer than I thought it would. I slipped into the mailbox of your apartment ten minutes ago. That’s it, the life debt has been repaid.”

    I whisper into the phone. “Thank you.” The line went dead.

    “Why was Noah calling you?” Z questioned, tilting his head.

    “She-she was doing me a favor, I guess.”

    “Oh.” He cleared his throat. “So, um, what were you gonna tell me?”

    “It can wait, there’s something I need to do now.” I say, slipping my hand from his and rushing out of the apartment.

    The file had everything. Everything. Names, numbers, amounts, locations, how much of the debt has been paid off, how much is left, and every job Z has ever worked. It was a crazy amount now, that much was for sure, what with the interest rates being extremely high. The time it would take to gather the amount to cover this debt would be a while, especially if I didn’t want to draw any attention to us. I would need at least three weeks to accomplish this, and that infuriated me because I just wanted this over and done with.

    For the past week and a half I barely left my room, only leaving to get food and energy drinks. And then I was right back at the computer, coding until my vision swam. I couldn’t think, couldn’t focus on anything but finally getting this done. The relief it would be, how amazing to be free once again. For him at least, there was no way I’d be let go without a fight, they’d probably rather kill me first. This was the one thing I could do for him though, give him freedom from this life, the freedom to live how he wanted now.

      I was about halfway through hacking into a very-well off businessman’s bank account- he wouldn’t miss a couple million dollars, not with how much he had stored away. When the door to my room burst open, revealing Z who looked quite frustrated about something. He stood there for a second, his eyes locked onto mine, and appeared quite domineering in the small doorway. Then he moved forward until he was right in front of where I sat, towering over me.

     “I got a call from Noah.” He finally said after what felt like hours.

      Panic rose in my chest, she wouldn’t tell him about what I’d asked her to do would she? As if he could sense my thoughts, Z laughed, nodding his head lightly.

     “She asked me if that file had been able to help with my situation. I didn’t know what she was talking about at first, but then she kindly explained it to me.” Z turned, his feet carrying him across my room. He kept going like that, pacing in order to piece together his thoughts so he could form a coherent sentence. “You had her risk her life to get my damn file. Why? Why was it so important, Reina?”

     I froze in my seat. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Z this upset about something I’ve done before. “I-I needed the file, Z. Your file is practically your life, and she said you saved Jongup’s life and for that she owed you. A life for a life!” I cry out in a weak attempt at an explanation for my actions.

     His head snapped towards me, and he stalked forward, his stare burning holes into my skull. “A life for a life? This isn’t 17th century B.C.E, normal people don’t live by those rules anymore! She could have died, Reina! Do you understand that?” Z shouted, the veins in his throat making an appearance and letting me know just how upset he was.

     By this point I was getting frustrated, tears had welled up in my eyes due to this frustration. “I know what could have happened! I’m not an idiot, Z. But when it comes down to it, the question to me was who is more important? Some girl I don’t know, or the guy who saved my life? It’s a no-brainer! Not when the guy in that question makes me feel safe, and makes me feel happy for the first time I can remember in years! To me, your life was more important, can’t you see that?” Tears streamed down my face as I spoke, the internal dam I built keeping them at bay having broke at his crushing words.

      Z froze, my words sending him into a stupor. “Wait, wait. What? Could you please repeat that?”

     “Which part? The part where I said you make me feel safe and happy? Or the fact that I find your life is more important?”

     The anger faded from his face, a small smile appearing. “That’s it. The part where I make you feel safe and happy. Really?”

     I let out a short laugh, choking softly on my tears. “How many times will I have to repeat myself? Yes, you make me feel safe, and happier than I have been in years. You-it’s so stupid, but you’ve become my sense of security, and you make me feel at ease, comfortable. I trust you. God, I’m such an idiot for admitting this.”

      I spin the chair around, not wanting to face him after baring my feelings like that. Hands on the back of the chair spun it back around to face him. His eyes were intense with some unknown emotion, it was a fire burning deep in them, seeming like it might jump out and swallow me whole. I kind of wanted that, for the fire in him to burn me up. What would it be like to be consumed like that? Would I cease to exist the second the fire’s put out? Or would I emerge a new person, a phoenix from the ashes?

     Z reached down, pulling me to my feet. “I can’t believe you feel that way.” He breathed out. “Because, damn, you make me feel almost the exact same way. You made me realize that I am not who this life made me become, you help me with that every day. Just with a smile or your snippy comments. Fuck, you make me so happy.”

     Without any warning his lips were pressed against mine the second he stopped talking. The kiss started slowly, a gentle pressure against my lips. Then it turned heated, his tongue slipping into my mouth to deepen the kiss, his hands gripped my hips, pulling me closer to him. A soft sigh escaped me when he finally broke from the kiss to take a breath, but he didn’t pause long, his lips went right to my neck not a few seconds later. My hands lifted up to thread through his hair, bringing his face back to mine. Our eyes met and I felt that connection I already had with him get stronger, pulling us closer together.

     “Take your shirt off.” I whispered, a faint blush rising to my cheeks.

***

     There was no hesitation from him as he yanked his shirt over his head, but then he smirked at me, giving me a heated look. I knew what he wanted- my shirt off as well. That was something I could do, the material slipped over my shoulders, leaving me in my bra and jeans. Then just like that we were once more attached at the mouth in a heated kiss. There was no real battle for dominance in this, just a sense of the two of us working in tandem. I was becoming impatient though, the fire boiling in my veins and pooling in my nether regions making me needy.

      My hand slid down his torso, coming to rest on his crotch, giving it a quick rub to which he bucked his hips in response. With that simple action, everything seemed to fast forward. One minute we were standing there making out with our shirts off, and the next we were both stripped naked laying haphazardly on the bed. His hands were exploring my body, squeezing, pinching and caressing, while his mouth made its own exploration with licks and bites. Of course I was going through the exact same exploration process with him, I wanted to know what made him tick. No, I needed to know what made him tick.

     With a particularly harsh pull of his erection, he let out a hiss, hips bucking up into my hand. “I need to know how far you want to take this… I don’t know how much more I can take.” Z grunted, his lips leaving my neck.

     I released his cock, my hands coming up to cup his face, making him look at me. “I want you. All of you. Right now.”

      All trepidation of this situation left him, and warmth filled my chest at his worry for me. Though that warmth soon disappeared as his fingers circled my clit, and one pumped inside me. A moan slipped from my throat at his ministrations. After the addition of a few more fingers, he determined I was ready. As he hovered over me, lining himself up with my wet heat, a look passed over his face. One that showed concern, happiness, and, I think, serenity. It was brief and quickly replaced once again by lust, but I knew what I’d seen.

     I cried out at his first thrust, hands clutching his shoulders desperately, willing myself to adjust quickly. “Move.” I panted out after a minute passed of him keeping still as a statue. Just like that the spell was broken, and Z began fucking me in earnest. His hips snapping into mine, driving me deeper into the mattress. Breathless moans were all I could manage at this point, with my head tossed back on the pillows, eyes half-lidded as I kept my gaze locked on his face. An assortment of grunts, groans and curses left him as he sped up, pounding harder and deeper into me.

     “F-Fuck! Right there!” I cry out as he hits my g-spot.

     He continues to fuck into me, hitting that one spot just as I asked, causing my orgasm to come crashing down on me without warning. My body quivers and shakes, muscles clenching around him as he continued to buck into me, trying to find his release. It didn’t take long either, not with the added constriction of my orgasm urging him on. Z shifted over so he was lying next to me, the sounds of our heavy breathing being the only things to fill the silence.

      My eyes shut instinctively as exhaustion washed over me. I hadn’t been taking proper care of myself recently, too focused on fixing Z’s situation. Sleep would be really good right now, and I had almost completely drifted off when I felt a cool, wet cloth on my body. I opened my eyes in irritation, upset that such beautiful sleep had been taken from me. But I couldn’t really be mad at him, he was just helping, trying to make me feel more comfortable.

     “Come on, let’s go to sleep.” He murmured after he put the cloth back into my bathroom, crawling into bed beside me. His arm wrapped around me, pulling me to his chest, and I knew then, I would have no trouble staying asleep. I nuzzled my head into his chest, letting his warmth envelope me, and promptly fell asleep. 

[gulescamisade]

Virginia: Day 1

[One instant they're on the ship, and the next they're someplace else entirely. They seem to be outside, among trees, the forest floor covered in a small blanket of snow. For those who look around, they will see not everyone from the UU is present. Only Davenforth, Derek, Riley, Penny, Roxanne, Takoda, Gaizka, Lifera, Qirin, the Mayor, and the Grand High Blood. If they check, all their belongings they had on them before will still be there. Comm devices, anything in their sylladex, and even their strife specibus is intact.]

DAVENFORTH: -Okay what the fuck. First, he was waiting for some heartwarming family reunion to be over and next he's peeling himself off the forest floor. Been a long time since he had this sensation. Groggy, he stands, taking in his location and those around him. Shit.-

LIFERA: -DOOF. She certainly wasn't prepared for something this inane to happen, and she's glad she didn't equip her 2x3dent in the midst of all this. But this is.... suddenly incredibly cold, and she hisses, pushing herself up out of the snow and shivering immediately.-

ROXANNE: -Oh likewise Davenforth, but also seriously what the actual fuck. Can't there be a few hour period of family reunions WITHOUT things going to all hell in exchange like what the shit. Roxanne is sitting up and trying to adjust to the swimming headache that comes with being unceremoniously dumped with teleportation into some strange forest.- Ngh..

PENNY: -She's stumbling until she plops right back on her butt, dropping the cigarette she was holding and watching it fizzle out in the snow.- FUCK.

MAYOR: -FLAILS AROUND. WHAT IS THIS WHITE NONSENSE. WHAT MANNER OF TRAP HAS HE BEEN TELEPORTED TO-

LIFERA: A)(--!

HIGHBLOOD: =Man he was braiding his hair.... what the hell=

QIRIN: =She miraculously managed to land on her feet during this=

DAVENFORTH: Well at least everyone is awake

HIGHBLOOD: =Keeps braiding and looks around=

DAVENFORTH: -Sees Lifera though. Walks over and uncaptchas an extra coat, offering it to her.-

QIRIN: =immediately begins to peel people off the ground if they are still getting themselves acquainted to it.= 

QIRIN: Is everyone all right?

DEREK: -once his ass is up, he's gonna tend to hoisting riley and also draping a coat on her gdi davenforth why we gotta be in synch here.-

LIFERA: Th-Thanks. -nestles in the coat, clearly uncomfortable in this climate-

RILEY: -her ass is PLANTED IN THE SNOW but before she knows it, derek's got her and already getting her a coat- what the actual fuck?!

DAVENFORTH: No problem

DAVENFORTH: Everyone else good so far

PENNY: IM GREAT THANKS FOR ASKING.

MAYOR: -tentatively eats a handful of snow-

ROXANNE: -Shes getting up and dusting herself off before rapidly checking her sylladex. This has happened too many times. Roxanne lets out a sigh of relief when she finds it all there.- Yeah. Good so far.

ROXANNE: 'Cept for the whole whatever that was.

RILEY: -penny's here too? and ROXANNE? WOW. she laughs because this is so gODDAMMN CRAZY BEFORE clearing her throat- is there like...another coat jacket blanket sweater whatever?

HIGHBLOOD: =Suddenly wearing this because coldblooded

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/36/65/27/366527e371625a8d07bba99b13685dbf.jpg

=

QIRIN: ....

HIGHBLOOD: =picks at fangs=

QIRIN: By chance, do you have more in there?

HIGHBLOOD: most assuredly my alabaster sismiss

ROXANNE: -........Eyyy clown buddy has got the threads. She would appreciate it if she wasnt now realizing that ONCE AGAIN shes been separated from every aspect of her small family in likely a life or death situation.-

PENNY: oh shit I want one.

ROXANNE: -8)-

DAVENFORTH: Ive also got regular coats if you dont wanna look like a pride yeti  

LIFERA: ... -Soft glubs. She glances around, sniffing in reservation.-

DAVENFORTH: Wait shit that sounds dope

HIGHBLOOD: =DUMPS tacky rainbow threads on all who needs em= color does yon motherfuck good HIGHBLOOD: best be lookin the best whilst you can broseph :o)

QIRIN: ^_^ Thank you, truly. =She picks one up and tries it on, pushing the neck fluff up to her cheeks. Team Pride Yetis are a go=

RILEY: thanks buddy. -he is her buddy, really- warmest one you got give to my sister. -nods her head in that direction.-

DEREK: -looks pennyward- Oh damn. Thats her?

HIGHBLOOD: y'alls all motherfuckin tiny as a bit they all warm when you layers on layers on layers em sis :oP

RILEY: uh huh. -she nods- imagine me like. 15 years younger. not pregnant. i'll kind of look like her, then.

DAVENFORTH: I always look my best -You Motherfuck...-

HIGHBLOOD: best could get bester =clown smiles in his obsenely bright and colorful winterwear= best get on out the cold

DAVENFORTH: None of us can fly huh

DAVENFORTH: Best vantage point is upward

RILEY: do we look like any of us can fly?

RILEY: let me get my extended wings and jet pack and just bust up into the sky.

HIGHBLOOD: i could juggle y'all that counts enough

QIRIN: What of these trees? I am sure we could scale them.

QIRIN: =maybe=

ROXANNE: -Excuse her and the clicking noise as she's setting up her rifle gun. Shes not screwing around.- We could try it but i dunno' whoever does should be good at climbing because falls can kill pretty quick.

HIGHBLOOD: =He might catch them... or he might not=

DAVENFORTH: Ill be right back -Flashsteps up one of the taller trees to see if he can get a decent vantage point-

RILEY: -throws her hands up in frustration at davenforth just GOIN OFF LIKE THAT- okay, bye.

HIGHBLOOD: =digging into an peach cobbler, hot and fresh from who knows where, one hand in the pocket, looking around=

QIRIN: =a little flatly at Davenforth's eagerness to shimmy up a tree= Oh thank goodness we have medical.

DAVENFORTH: -He's just anime jumping up it branch by branch JESUS. It's perfectly safe, right Derek?-

ROXANNE: -Please dont fall though.-

HIGHBLOOD: =But if you do, do a flip=

ROXANNE: -No.-

HIGHBLOOD: =Two flips=

[At the top of the trees, Davenforth will see MORE TREES... but in the far distance, there are lights coming from a tented area the size of a small village. Maybe it's a... circus?]

DAVENFORTH: -Sighs- At least it aint texas

ROXANNE: -Finishes prepping her gun and slings it over her shoulder, while she watches Davenforth from the ground.-

LIFERA: -She's starting to pace to keep warm. Heck.-

DAVENFORTH: -Checks his comm. Oh shit. Virginia huh? He starts making his way down the tree landing on his feet with the softest thud-

ROXANNE: -Nice dismount. Stuck the landing.-

ROXANNE: See anythin' up there?

PENNY: -draping herself in what's practically a rainbow tent. Ahh yes.- alright whatevers going on Im not standing here fuck deep in snow.

DAVENFORTH: Hope you guys like camping cuz were gonna be playing the wild thornberries for a while

DAVENFORTH: Good news is theres what can be considered civilization miles ahead

QIRIN: Good idea. Are berries in season?

RILEY: great. -sighs, hugging the coat tighter against her-

DAVENFORTH: Bad news is it looks like the ringaling brothers are here

ROXANNE: -Raises a brow.- What?

QIRIN: =shrugs at roxanne=

HIGHBLOOD: =LEANS= them motherfuckers?? =furrows brows=

DAVENFORTH: Grape ape over there is gonna feel real at home soon im guessin

HIGHBLOOD: mine home is where i roam bromie

PENNY: -she's already trudging through the snow. BYE YALL-

HIGHBLOOD: =Goodbye forever lil sis=

DAVENFORTH: That lovely lady has the right idea she might wanna walk to the left a bit though

ROXANNE: ! -Spots a fleeing penny.- Uh hey.

ROXANNE: Maybe you shouldn't go off on your own like that? -Whoever she is, she didnt get the name, only that shes related to riley.-

RILEY: -sighs- hey! where the fuck are you going?

HIGHBLOOD: =He shrugs and starts to roam, tapping on his com and slorping some faygo. The lorge walks through the snow surprisingly quiet=

PENNY: -turns left a little. THANKS GUY.-

PENNY: Im freezing my ass off and I dont know none of yall.

HIGHBLOOD: word on the block's you got fam littlest bit

HIGHBLOOD: that's the block, stalkin ya

RILEY: so your plan is to get lost?

DAVENFORTH: Introducing yourself is the quickest way to still not know someone but at least know their name

PENNY: hi Im Penny.

QIRIN: I am Weramiru Qirin, former queen of Prospit, abdicated in 2619, best decision of my life. I am now one of the Unbreakable Union's doctors. =Holds out her hand like Disney Jane and Tarzan introducing themselves.=

HIGHBLOOD: =Pft, royals=

DAVENFORTH: -What a nerd. He loves her-

ROXANNE: Hey, Penny. I'm not as fancy as Qirin, but ya'can call me Roxanne. -How friendly does she looked all stressed out and with a loaded weapon slung over her shoulder.-

QIRIN: You do not have to be fancy when you are already a brilliant scientist, Roxanne.

PENNY: -side eyes Qirin... high fives her.-

QIRIN: ^_^ =highfives=

ROXANNE: .......Aw heck. -Thats adorable.- Thanks Qirin.

RILEY: enough introductions to get us all going the same direction? perfect. let's go.

PENNY: sorry but no.

MAYOR: -he points to his sash-

PENNY: Im gonna go this way and you can go whatever other way.

MAYOR: -u were missing one. now u know-

HIGHBLOOD: aight =keeps walking= can't make no motherfucker amble on where they don't wanna get their legs =walks behind a tree and disappears=

HIGHBLOOD: =Sliding casually down the other side of the hill, slorping faygo=

PENNY: ....wtf.

DAVENFORTH: Thank god the mayor is okay

QIRIN: ......................

RILEY: -glances at this adorable carapacian and has no idea why he's pointing at his sash but he's so adorable she has to force herself to focus on the situation at hand- well, i'm going where you go. so...you can either go with everybody else or be stuck with just me.

QIRIN: =watches GHB disappear with her own two eyeballs. She should be accustomed to strange occurrences by now, but the fact of the matter is that she is NOT.=

DAVENFORTH: -Catches up to Penny-

PENNY: are you seriously going to do this right now?

DAVENFORTH: Youre an independent woman i like and respect that but right now at this particular juncture of what the absolute fuck is going on we should probably stick together until were not just in a forest with snow also sup penny pleasure to meet you names davenforth

PENNY: look.

PENNY: I just dont want to deal with her.

RILEY: oh jesus christ.

ROXANNE: -Just chilling with Qirin. She aint going near that whole family debacle happening.-

HIGHBLOOD(?): =From somewhere........ a pie appears in Riley's hand=

RILEY: ...

DAVENFORTH: Who riley come on she aint that bad bark is definitely worse than the bite

MAYOR: -ponders, pulling out his YARDSTICK SPEAR. he begins drawing something in the snow...-

RILEY: -sufficiently distracted by there being a pie in her hands all of a sudden. is anybody else seeing this?-

HIGHBLOOD(?): =With a cherry=

PENNY: Im pretty sure I know what shes capable of thanks.

ROXANNE: -Yikes and she thought her and Ruth were bad.-

DAVENFORTH: Im not gonna doubt that but we should still stick together

DAVENFORTH: Just because shes here dont mean you gotta talk to her though

RILEY: -holding this pie with a cherry on top.- oh god i'm having one of those weird dreams again aren't i?

ROXANNE: -Nope, you arent Riley.-

DEREK: -pinches riley's arm-

MAYOR: -he's DONE WITH HIS DRAWING. he turns and scampers up to penny and pokes her in the side with his spear thingy.-

HIGHBLOOD(?): =DO IT.... is she not gonna do it.... it's a great pie...... says the universe=

DAVENFORTH: Maybe the mayor can help better

RILEY: -slaps derek's arm as an automatic reflex- oh. nope. -WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS PIE. do you want me to stick it in someone's FACE?-

DAVENFORTH: Thanks mayor

PENNY: cool cuz dont expect that to work.

QIRIN: =hangin back here with Roxanne. For the same reasons. Dave's got this handled.=

DAVENFORTH: -He does not, in fact, have this handled.-

HIGHBLOOD(?): =What else are pies for... it's a sleepytime pie. Maybe. PRobably=

ROXANNE: -Nah, you got it handled.-

PENNY: -looks down at Mayor.- ??

ROXANNE: -Produces a scarf and silently offers it to Qirin. Shes got a lot, but they wont match the coats..-

RILEY: -inspects the pie further. a sleepytime pie? do you want me to put my sister to SLEEP-

MAYOR: -POINTS AT HIS FINISHED PIECE. it appears to be a large checkerboard carefully drawn in the snow, complete with the pieces!!!! there are white ones and black ones. The black ones are represented by his footprints, while the white ones are basically just circles. They appear to be in a position of CHECK, judging by the fact that the king is surrounded, and the rook and queen are on other sides of the biard, and the black pieces have like THREE WHOLE QUEENS, but nevetherless, it is not yet checkmate. He points to the king and then draws a line to an empty space.-

HIGHBLOOD(?): :o)

MAYOR: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

QIRIN: ^o^ =pleasantly surprised= Oh thank you, Roxanne. How kind of you.

ROXANNE: No problem, Q.

QIRIN: =gazes intently at this drawing=

RILEY: -only if...she wants to go off on her own again...-

PENNY: -stares intently down at this chess board... and looks back at the Mayor.- sorry bud but I got no fuckin clue what youre trying to tell me.

MAYOR: -THROWS HIS ARMS UP-

MAYOR: -ENDOMORPHS ARE HOPELESS-

PENNY: heh.

PENNY: youre pretty cute tho.

MAYOR: -points to his sash again-

PENNY: ...mayo....R.

MAYOR: -jitters-

PENNY: ohhhh. Mayor??

MAYOR: -JITTERS!!!!-

RILEY: -come on little dude. you can get her to stay-

PENNY: I got no idea what mayoring has to do with games but its cool I guess.

MAYOR: -jitters his way back over to the snowboard and begins doing some changes, plopping some snow on top of the kind and drawing in a NEW piece, in a relatively safe spot and NOT in check, before drawing some arrows from the other rook and queen.- He points excitedly at it.-

PENNY: .... were winning chess?

MAYOR: -shakes his head. THUMBS DOWN. definitely losing.-

PENNY: look I wasnt that much of a nerd in high school. I can kick ass at Connect Four though.

PENNY: okay. we suck at chess. thats accurate.

DAVENFORTH: -Hear him in your HEART penny-

MAYOR: -hmm, hmm. He points to her, and then he points to the king. And then he draws a little picture of one of the bishops putting the king in check on top of the king's head.-

MAYOR: -THEN he points at the rook and the queen, pointing at Davenforth and Derek.-

PENNY: ...

ROXANNE: -So Derek or Davenforth are the queen and the other is a rook.-

MAYOR: -he doesn't know what piece u are. HE DOESN'T KNOW YOU LADY-

PENNY: alright. sunglass guys are badasses.

DEREK: -thumbs up-

PENNY: -SIGHS-

RILEY: -elbows him-

MAYOR: ...

MAYOR: -OK SO NOW HE JUST JUMPS ALL OVER THE SNOW, drawing a bunch of pieces around the king. And then a CIRCLE around them.-

PENNY: yeah yeah okay I get it.

PENNY: if I run off Im boned.

PENNY: is that what youre trying to tell me?

MAYOR: -NODS-

MAYOR: -you've only got one move in check-

PENNY: well Ive basically been boned my whole life so thats really nothing new.

PENNY: I like you though.

MAYOR: -jitters a shaky thumbs up-

DEREK: -ELBOW'D OOF.- So were stickin together this time gang?

PENNY: here cmere you look cold as balls. -shuffles over to wrap mayor up in her rainbow funtime coat-

MAYOR: -! -THAT IS KIND. he is hard, like the kind of resin that'd go around a chess piece. UNSURPRISINGLY-

PENNY: -he is a friend...- yeah I guess.

RILEY: -relief-

DAVENFORTH: Told you the mayor is the best

DAVENFORTH: Thanks mayor

DEREK: Groovy.

RILEY: i don't think i ever want you to say that again. -at Derek.-

DEREK: What? It is groovy.

ROXANNE: -Clears throat- Not ta' break this fun time up but.

DEREK: -smirks, then slips an arm around here- So we movin or did I just agree to freezin to death with yall?

ROXANNE: We good to move-

ROXANNE: Yeah what Derek just said.

DEREK: Great minds.

RILEY: -leans into him and sighs- let's go.

DEREK: -PROCEEDS-

ROXANNE: -LIKEWISE. Shes ready to march.-

MAYOR: -scampers along inside a coat-

DAVENFORTH: -Goes to check on Lifera again- You need another coat

RILEY: -might be slowing derek a little down by how she's trying to guarantee penny is going with them-

LIFERA: I need. Probubbly. Ten coats.

PENNY: -shuffles with the mayo. she's very tempted to scoop him up like a kid....-

ROXANNE: -Does the fish queen want scarves? She has scarves.-

LIFERA: -YES-

MAYOR: -HE IS AN ELECTED OFFICIAL-

ROXANNE: -Slows her walk enough so that she can distribute them to anyone who wants them.- Life time a knitting finally came in handy. Thank you highschool arts an'crafts.

QIRIN: =Takes a couple small cloth packs out of her sylladex, shakes them up, and hands them over to Lifera.=

QIRIN: Please, take them. They are hand warmers.

ROXANNE: -YOU get a scarf and YOU get a scarf. They are long and thick, and come in a bunch of different colors (Although mostly shades of purple)-

DAVENFORTH: -Uncaptchas his red trench coat and drapes it over Lifera. It's his favorite coat ever. Don't let anything happen to it.-

[Eventually they make it to the clowny congregation. Upon closer inspection, it's almost like... a clown shanty town, if such a thing exists. It's grungy. A chicken is running through the middle of the town. There are people wandering around -- humans in face paint. From one of the tents (maybe) this tune is playing:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rqEwX9Orp7M

]

HIGHBLOOD: =He's been here the whole time. Staring...... watching......... in disbelief=

ROXANNE: -........Wow. This sure is something.-

LIFERA: -piles all these articles on her body in the walk- Glub... T)(ANK you.

LIFERA: ... -stares at all this-

QIRIN: ^ ^

DEREK: Oh for fucks sake.

DAVENFORTH: No

PENNY: .......

DEREK: Come on guys we leavin.

PENNY: -starts turning her and mayor around in a slow circle-

DEREK: -TURNS HIMSELF AND RILEY AROUND-

DAVENFORTH: Lets go the other way

PENNY: throw that ass in a circle the fuck out.

LIFERA: WAD-----E.

QIRIN: I am inclined to agree.

HIGHBLOOD: =Suddenly....... spiky club=

LIFERA: LOOK. They seem mostly... )(UMAN?

LIFERA: Maybe.

QIRIN: !

DAVENFORTH: Even worse

RILEY: where the hell are we?

LIFERA: It's probubbly some sort of... new jurisdiction.

ROXANNE: -Seconds that !- 

ROXANNE: -Although shes also carrying a gun, she has no room to talk on the weapons front, but seeing a spike wielding giant is a little more intimidating.-

RILEY: oh. hey. big guy. whatcha doing?

LIFERA: -side eyes GHB-

MAYOR: -HIDES HIS EYES-

PENNY: -also hides his eyes. you are safe now.-

HIGHBLOOD: =drapes his rainbow robes over a fence and ominously drags the club right into town= cleanin a stain upon mine religion

QIRIN: ...

TAKODA: -OH YEAH HE'S HERE-

TAKODA: UMMM.

DAVENFORTH: Woah there

TAKODA: TH1S SEEMS L1KE A MOMENT, WHERE 1 M1GHT WANT TO TRY SOME... D1PLOMACY...

ROXANNE: Hhh. Might wanna' try it fast then.

RILEY: -makes a horrified face- wait, what?

ROXANNE: -But no, big clown wont really go smash all these tents up right? RIGHT??-

HIGHBLOOD: =EYEBALLS..... his bro gaizka gets the boink on with this brown he knows......... Hm...... flexes his jaw and holds up a big palm= two minutes. =uncharacteristically sensible...ish=

TAKODA: -smiles, clasping hands together- GREAT! AH... 

TAKODA: LET'S ASK THEM 1F THEY MAYBE... HAVE SOME MODE OF TRANSPORTAT1ON, WE CAN BORROW, OR UH... PURCHASE, 1F NEED BE?

HIGHBLOOD: take.

LIFERA: GLUB.

HIGHBLOOD: i ain't buyin shit from no motherfuckin blasphemors

LIFERA: Let us do something NOW, then, shell we????

RILEY: (is being a juggalo a real religion now?) -very quietly so as not to offend the big guy-

DEREK: (Yeah its a weird troll thing.)

RILEY: (oh my god.)

DAVENFORTH: Thought youd proud to see some like minded thinkers whats wrong big guy

HIGHBLOOD: =Looks down to Davenforth, unamused= ain't likeminded 

HIGHBLOOD: they got shit twisted, i'm inclined as a motherfuck of strong beliefs to untwist them

TAKODA: -bravely tries to address a lady juggalo- JUGGALETTE: -turns around and she's topless- 

TAKODA: OH. YOUR RUMBLE SPHERES. ARE OUT 1N THE OPEN, 1 SEE. 

TAKODA: ... 1SN'T 1T A L1TTLE COLD? -proceeds to try to convince her to put a coat on-

HIGHBLOOD: =That's right..... eat up your time=

LIFERA: -just starts aggressively walking through this village of weird human anger clowns-

DAVENFORTH: -Baybe?-

DAVENFORTH: Looks all the same to me bunch of face paint drowning their lives out in sugar and drugs

RILEY: can't we just steal from them? that would be more fun than killing them.

[Lifera passes by two juggalos taking turns hitting each other in the face with a street sign. You know, just for fun.]

DAVENFORTH: A lot less reserved though

DAVENFORTH: Definitely not as dangerous

RILEY: find me a car and i'll hotwire us out of here.

LIFERA: ...-wtf-...

HIGHBLOOD: it ain't the same and diplomacy's gotta clock 

HIGHBLOOD: don't know what motherfuckin mockery of bullshit this is but i'm fit to stamp it out, you ain't eager to cease my stampins for all the ignorance you spit sos i jive with that at least

LIFERA: -She's looking for any sort of shelter or transport they can use before things get ugly, plus she's freezing.-

QIRIN: =...= ... 

QIRIN: .............

[She eventually comes upon a big party bus. It's all graffiti'd up with weird little symbols of a dude with a hatchet, also covered in what's probably mud and blood...]

DAVENFORTH: If youre gonna stomp out some mostly harmless folks then ill definitely stop that they aint hurtin nobody but themselves

RILEY: (is this really a conversation we're having right now.)

DAVENFORTH: Dont sweat em they aint the issue

LIFERA: -LOUD GLUBBING.- OV-ER )(-ER--------E!

HIGHBLOOD: =He sighs, looking around again at all these humans shitting on his religion, hand flexes on the club= can't stop inevitable broseph 

HIGHBLOOD: but the snake cranium is much preferred =Looks Lifera-ward and starts to drag his club through town again=

DAVENFORTH: -Zips over.-

[The door to the party busy is just... open... A chicken glides out.]

LIFERA: -watches it go...- 

LIFERA: .... I'M S)(OR-E IT'S FIN-E.

LIFERA: 38)

QIRIN: ......

DEREK: Ive traveled in worse conditions.

RILEY: jesus. 

RILEY: i haven't traveled in anything with blood on it. well...not THAT much.

PENNY: lmao Id be surprised if my car DIDNT have blood on it.

PENNY: speaking of which miss you baby.

PENNY: everybody in before I freeze my titties off.

DAVENFORTH: Cover your tits then damn are the juggalos getting to you already

QIRIN: =what is life=

HIGHBLOOD: =Eyeballs the devil settlement= ....... =He'll be back=

DAVENFORTH: -Yells for Takoda-

PENNY: hey I could get down with some free titties.

RILEY: -gets her ass on this bus and takes a seat. her feet hurt and ryan's being rowdy-

TAKODA: HUH? OH. 1T WAS N1CE MEET1NG YOU PLEASE PUT ON A SH1RT-- -runs back over to his FRIENDS-

HIGHBLOOD: =If only everyone wasn't so proactive...... is salty, is seething. Is texting in the back and surprisingly..... not weighing this van down like mofo?=

PENNY: -he's like a bird.... in colorful feathers...-

HIGHBLOOD: =A goose=

HIGHBLOOD: =HO NK=

DAVENFORTH: Koda i nominate you for bus driver

TAKODA: }:D TAKODA: THAT SOUNDS L1KE FUN. -gets in the driver's seat. the keys are just... in there.-

DAVENFORTH: Dont crash us bro -Takes a seat-

LIFERA: -snuggles up with Davenforth almost immediately. WARM HER.-

DAVENFORTH: -Space Heater protocol: Commence-

TAKODA: -once everyone is in... he tries to back up, only to accidentally crash into a tent- WHOOPS. 

TAKODA: 1'VE NEVER DR1VEN A LAND VEH1CLE... W1TH TH1S MUCH CLEARANCE BEFORE. JUST... JUST A SECOND... -forward again, carefully trying to maneuver... backs into another tent.- 

TAKODA: SH1T. UHH... -does this several more times before they can pull out of this spot and drive OUT of the settlement-

RILEY: -JERKS FORWARD and grabs onto the seat in front of her- holy shit.

QIRIN: =clears her throat= Are you sure about this?

HIGHBLOOD: =Good yes=

QIRIN: Takoda?

TAKODA: YES, SORRY. WE SHOULD BE GOOD NOW. }:) -sweats... driving down the road from the now partially demolished settlement. the mirthful messiahs were in GHB's favor.-

RILEY: carry on soldier.

QIRIN: =she's gonna stay awake....just in case....=

HIGHBLOOD: =this is why he's a faithful devote believer... he'll fix this. They know he will=

TAKODA: -turns on the radio and icp is playing... on every station- ... UMM. -the quiet is better anyway. he'll keep driving until somebody requests a stop, but there's at least a bathroom on the bus. it might be the worst thing they've ever seen, but it is a bathroom.-

QIRIN: =sideeyes takoda when the radio comes on=

[bubblegxmed-blog]

How to Fight a Carmine: A guide by Lay

So its late and rather than thinking “hey let’s take my ass to sleep” I instead start watching female mma videos and go “i should make a skillset list for Car!” 

Make no mistake, my little possum queen may be easy on the eyes and seemingly of average intellgence, it’s gonna take a lot of effort to really knock her off her feet. So here’s a quick reference for y’all and myself esp. since she’s a violent mess and I do like fighting threads.

+Strengths!

Stronger than she appears - Working on a farm at a pretty young age is a really good way to build some muscle. Now ofc she doesn’t have superhuman strength or maybe the strength of a bodybuilder perhaps but she is strong enough to (a) put someone in a bearhug and break a bone, (b) lift people and things that are bigger than her such as Al who is a foot taller than her and also a rather athletic man, (c) body slam/suplex an unwitting opponent who thinks those big fluffy arms are useless. Funnily enough, she has this trait in common with her Nana Garland who was of a similar body shape and strength level

Slightly above average combatant - A combo of natural talent, getting into a lot of fights and picking up tricks, and taking classes under false identities; Car has a pretty good shot a knocking someone out. She favors hand to hand combat for that reason, along with her brawler like fighting style that is extremely aggressive and quite overwhelming. She tends to favor punch outs in which that strength comes in handy (along with the misconception that her size makes her less agile or reactive when all it really does is add more force to the blow), grappling, using her elbow and knees for really damaging blows. Surprisingly she has a pretty good high kick and is okay at dodging hits from not so trained fighters. However if it’s her versus an extremely well trained fighter, she’s probably just gonna go down fighting...unless....

Good at improvising & fighting dirty - Do not make the foolish mistake of even thinking she’s above hair-pulling or scratching out ya eyeballs. Nut shots, biting, hell maybe even a human shield if she’s up for it! Car is also a pretty clever girl and can occasionally fight with a clear head, being able to scan the environment to help her out. Tables, box cutters, or even a handkerchief are quite dangerous in her hands. She’s a fast thinker on a good day and will use whatever is in her grasp to win.

Marksmanship - The kid idolized Annie Oakley and it’s definitely paid off. Car has been practicing with guns since childhood and has no problem with moving targets. While she favors revolvers and shotguns, she’s noticeably a better shot than most police officers and henchmen regardless of the firearm. Tends to incorporate this into her hand to hand fights for a quick kill or to injure an opponent if she’s feeling really mean. And yes while it’s super improbable she likes to dual wield bc she’s a fucking child.

A People Person - While she may not be a genius prodigy or Olympic level athlete, Carmine’s real intelligence is her street smarts and affinity for just making people uncomfortable. This knowledge is shown best during her serial killer days when she literally banked on the fact that no one expects a killer to be a woman and previous experiences with the police has informed her just how incompetent they are. Car can learn a lot about a person in a short span of time and uses her scatter brained, childish persona to hide this skill. Therefore she can get a general grasp of their likes and dislikes and use that to either intimidate or befriend. In a combat situation this comes in handy in areas that allow her to put space between them and give her time to talk. Not only that but her infamy in West Coast makes her seem more like a boogeyman that human so she’s 100% down to play into that fantasy during fights. Those who don’t know her simply see this kooky childish girl and make the poor mistake of thinking she can’t hold her own.

- Weaknesses

Is a smol - She’s only 5′3 so bigger opponents are a way bigger threat

Impulsive and Emotional - Made her cry? Good, you have a higher chance of winning bc she’s more likely to make dumber decisions (reckless swinging, shot the wrong target, etc.) but there’s also a chance she even more likely to kill because of that good old fashioned all consuming b.orderline rage that makes her see red. Also, it’s pretty hard to truly get under her skin.

Lack of self-awareness - Car tends to forget that she isn’t immortal and will gamble her life for stupid things w/o realizing it. She tends to take on more difficult opponents for this exact reason and rather fight for thrills than a logical reason at all. Has no problem fighting in buildings on fire or continue a fight despite winning or losing.

Usual Arsenal:

Partial to twin revolvers (named Lucy & Desi, covered in pink glitter), a classic Remington shotgun (Billie, painted in a pink and orange swirl on the barrel), and an HK53 semi-automatic rifle (Hedy, painted yellow)

Fire axe, named Minerva, acquired it during a robbery and instantly fell in love

Various stiletto knives hidden on her person

Spiked baseball bats, usually a, oddly unnamed, yellow one with a smiley face

Some type of explosive such as grenades, dynamite sticks, etc.

When she’s in the company of tech friends such as Vi, she tends to have gimmick gadgets such as a Rubik cube bomb, confetti bolas, a bubblegum gun, an acid shooting Super Soaker, etc.

any other things you’d like to know hmu at 1800-DONTDOIT